How to Make Space for Playful Fatherhood When You Are Drained 

Parenting Perspective 

Many fathers carry the weight of providing, and it is understandable to feel drained when you return home after long hours. However, children often experience presence through small, playful interactions rather than extended amounts of time. The key is not to pressure yourself into becoming a different person at the end of a long day, but to reframe what playfulness looks like in your relationship. 

Play does not have to mean energetic games. It can be as simple as a five-minute riddle before bedtime, pretending to be ‘customers’ when eating dinner, or sharing a silly handshake. These micro-moments of fun send the message that you see your child and value joy with them. Even when you are tired, short doses of intentional connection are enough to build lasting memories.

 

Build Play into Routines 

One useful approach is to build play into routines you already have, so it does not feel like an extra task. For example, turn the walk from the car into a race, or make prayers together feel warm by letting your child call the iqamah. In this way, the responsibility of fatherhood and the joy of fatherhood can flow together without draining you further. 

It is also important to give yourself permission to rest. Sometimes, fathers delay connection because they imagine it must be big or perfect. In truth, a child appreciates consistency more than grand gestures. By offering steady, light-hearted attention, even in small amounts, you model balance between duty and presence. 

Spiritual Insight 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Furqaan (25), verse 74: 

‘And those people that say: “O our Sustainer, Grant to us (those circumstances that make) our spouses and our offspring, a comfort for our eyes; and make us from those that have attained piety, and a role model”.’ 

This verse shows that the true joy of family is not in material provision alone, but in children becoming a source of comfort. That comfort is nurtured through warmth, affection, and shared connection. 

The Prophetic Model: Making Space for Play 

When the holy Prophet ﷺ came home, he used to play with his children and his family. The holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ played with his grandsons and loved them a lot. It is recorded in Jami al-Tirmidhi that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said:  

‘Whoever loves them, loves me. Whoever hates them hates me.’ 

[Jami al-Tirmidhi,3774] 

Despite carrying immense responsibility, the holy Prophet ﷺ made space for moments of play and affection, showing us that such time is not separate from fatherhood but part of it. His example reminds us that joy in the family is an act of worship when done with sincerity. 

By weaving small, playful interactions into your existing routines, you show your child that even in your fatigue, you choose them. This balance honours your role as a provider while also giving them the security and joy that only a father’s presence can bring.