How to Balance Being Present and Being Responsible 

Parenting Perspective 

This is a tension many parents quietly carry , the pull between showing up at the office and showing up at home. The fear of missing irreplaceable childhood moments can weigh heavily, especially when your intention is to serve your family through provision. 

How Present Are You? 

Begin by shifting the question from ‘how much time’ to ‘how present am I in the time I do have?’ Children are deeply attuned to emotional availability. A five-minute bedtime story with full eye contact and soft conversation will register more deeply than an hour in the same room but distracted. Prioritise short, anchored rituals , such as a shared breakfast on weekends, or a personalised du’a before school. These small touchpoints become spiritual and emotional memory. 

Review Your Work Structure 

At the same time, review how your work is structured. Are there boundaries you can draw? Is your job stealing more than it is sustaining? Sometimes ‘providing’ becomes a moving target , and it helps to regularly ask: what does our family actually need right now , more money, or more me? 

Let Them Know Why You Work 

Let your children know why you work , not as an excuse, but as a form of honouring. Say, ‘I go to work so we have what we need, but I miss you too.’ When they feel emotionally prioritised, they are more likely to interpret your absence through love rather than neglect. 

Balance is rarely perfect. What matters is the tone of your return. Come back from work slowly. Notice your posture, your face, your voice. Let your return home feel like a soft landing , for you, and for them. 

Spiritual Insight 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Mulk (67), verse 15: 

‘It is He who has made for you the Earth subservient (to your needs); so, walk (freely) amongst its marvels; and eat of the nourishment He has provided for you; and to Him is the (ultimate) Resurrection.‘

This Verse legitimises your pursuit of provision. Working to support your family is a noble part of being Allah’s servant. But it also reminds us that all effort must live within the awareness of our return to Him. 

The Prophetic Model: Your Responsibility in the Home 

It is recorded in Sahih al-Bukhari that the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said:

‘The best of you is the one who is best to his family.‘

This Hadith centres your responsibility in the home. It tells us that how you treat your family , how they feel in your presence , is not extra. It is the real work. Keep striving for balance, but never underestimate the power of your gentleness when you do return. That is what your children will remember.