How do I teach patience to a toddler who wants everything now? 

Parenting Perspective 

Make Waiting Playful and Visual 

A toddler’s struggle with patience is natural, as their concept of time is still developing. The best way to teach this skill is to start small and make waiting feel playful. For example, when they ask for something, you can say, ‘Let’s count to ten together, and then it will be ready!’ Visual cues, like a sand timer, are also excellent tools for helping a young child to understand the concept of waiting in a concrete way. 

Model Calmness and Praise Effort 

It is crucial to model patience in your own responses. When your toddler is being demanding, respond calmly rather than immediately rushing to meet their demand. When they successfully manage to wait, even for a short time, offer them warm and enthusiastic praise: ‘You did such a good job waiting!’ This helps your toddler to associate patience with positive feelings rather than frustration. 

Lay the Foundations for Self-Control 

These small, repeated lessons lay the foundation for greater self-control and patience as they grow older. By combining short practice with encouragement, you help your toddler build this essential skill without shame. 

Spiritual Insight 

Allah is With the Patient 

Islam values patience (sabr) as one of the highest virtues. The Quran gives believers the beautiful reassurance that when they practise patience, they are never alone, because Allah Himself is with them. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Baqarah (2), Verse 153: 

‘O those of you who are believers, seek assistance (from Allah Almighty) through resilience and prayer, indeed, Allah (Almighty) is with those that are resilient.‘ 

Patience is the Best of Gifts 

The prophetic tradition teaches us that patience is not just a skill we learn, but also a divine gift from Allah that is more comprehensive and valuable than any other. This encourages us to strive for it, knowing its great worth. 

It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, 1780, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘No one has been given a gift better and more comprehensive than patience.’ 

Early Seeds of Sabr 

When you frame the act of waiting as a chance to practise patience (sabr) a quality that is beloved by Allah your toddler learns a profound lesson. They begin to see that waiting is not just a struggle, but something that makes them stronger. These early seeds of sabr can grow into a lifetime of resilience and emotional strength.