Parenting Perspective 

A shy child often has the desire to be polite but can feel overwhelmed by the social focus that accompanies a greeting, sometimes causing them to mumble, hide, or avoid eye contact. The goal is not to pressure them into becoming extroverted, but to help them find comfortable yet respectful ways to offer greetings. Taking small, consistent steps is the best way to build their confidence gradually. 

Practise in a Safe Environment 

Use role-playing at home with familiar family members to practise greetings. You can begin with very short, simple exchanges of ‘Assalamu Alaikum’. It is important to use playful encouragement rather than pressure, for instance, by saying, ‘Let’s see who can say salaam with the biggest smile.’ Practising in a familiar and safe setting makes the real situation feel far less intimidating. 

Pair Them with a Confident Ally 

When greeting others, allow your child to stand beside you for support. You can model the greeting first, then gently invite them to repeat it after you. This pairing provides a sense of security. Over time, you can gradually reduce your support as their confidence grows, until they feel capable of offering greetings on their own. 

Celebrate Effort, Not Perfection 

If your shy child manages even a quiet salaam or a small smile, it is a significant step. Acknowledge it warmly with praise like, ‘I saw you say salaam to our guest; that was very respectful and kind.’ This type of positive encouragement helps them to associate greetings with a sense of pride rather than anxiety, motivating them to try again. 

Spiritual Insight 

Within Islam, greetings of peace are understood to be more than just polite words; they are considered acts of worship that spread love and blessings throughout the community. 

A Command for Respectful Entry 

The Quran establishes greetings as a fundamental aspect of showing respect for others’ privacy and seeking permission before entering their space. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Noor (24), Verses 27: 

‘ O those of you who are believers, do not enter houses (of other people) except your own homes; unless you have permission from them, (and when you do) say Salaams upon the inhabitants…’ 

This verse reminds us that offering a greeting is a divine command tied directly to the etiquette of visiting others. 

The Key to Mutual Love 

The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ taught that the greeting of peace is not merely a social custom but is foundational to the love that binds the believers and strengthens their faith. 

It is recorded in Sunan Ibn Majah, Hadith 68, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘You will not enter Paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another. Shall I tell you something which, if you do, you will love one another? Spread salaam among yourselves.’ 

By supporting your shy child in this practice, you are helping them fulfil an essential Islamic duty with growing confidence. They will eventually learn that even a gentle salaam, offered with sincerity, is beloved to Allah and strengthens the bonds of their community.