How do I stop myself from constantly checking my phone in front of my child? 

Parenting Perspective 

Our children learn far more from what we model than from what we say. If you want your child to develop a healthy relationship with technology, the change must begin with your own habits. The challenge is not simply about willpower; it is about creating practical barriers to distraction and meaningful replacements for the habit. 

Create ‘No-Phone’ Zones and Times 

Decide on specific moments or locations that will be designated ‘no-phone’ times. This could include all mealtimes, the school pick-up and journey home, and the bedtime routine. During these times, physically place your phone in another room or in a drawer. This physical separation is far more effective than relying on willpower alone to resist the temptation. 

Replace the Reflex with a Mindful Action 

The urge to check a phone is often a subconscious reflex. To break it, you need to replace it with a different action. When you feel that impulse, consciously do something else: take a slow, deep breath, take a sip of water, or, best of all, make direct eye contact with your child. Over time, you can retrain your brain to associate these cues with presence instead of scrolling. 

Be Honest About Your Efforts 

You do not have to pretend to be perfect. Be open with your child about what you are trying to do. You could say, ‘I am really trying to use my phone less when I am with you, so we can have more time together.’ Children often become wonderful allies in reminding you of your own goals, which can make you more accountable. 

Acknowledge Your Small Victories 

Breaking a habit is difficult work. Notice and quietly celebrate the moments when you succeed in resisting the urge to scroll. Progress is built through a series of repeated, small victories, not through achieving perfection overnight. Be gentle with yourself in the process. 

By intentionally managing your own screen habits, you are not only improving your own focus but also showing your child that self-control is a valuable, learned skill, and that they matter more to you than any device. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches us to be vigilant guardians of our time and attention, as both are precious blessings that have been entrusted to us by Allah. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Asr (103), Verses 1–3: 

‘By the (design of) time (by Allah Almighty), indeed, mankind shall surely (remain in a state) of) deprivation (moral deficit). Except for those people who are believers and undertake virtuous acts; and encouraging (cultivating within themselves and with one another the realisation and dissemination of) the truth and encouraging (cultivating within themselves and with one another the realisation and accomplishment of) resilience…’ 

This powerful chapter reminds us that how we choose to spend our time is the ultimate measure of our success or loss in the sight of Allah. 

It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 6412, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘There are two blessings which many people lose: health and free time.’ 

This hadith teaches us that misusing our free time, even in small, seemingly insignificant ways, can cause us to lose out on immense opportunities for goodness. By consciously putting your phone aside to be present with your child, you are honouring both your relationship with them and your greater responsibility before Allah for how you use the moments of your life.