How do I set boundaries around screen use at night without sounding controlling? 

Parenting Perspective 

Setting boundaries around night-time screen use is most effective when it is framed as an act of care, not control. Children, particularly older ones, respond far better when they understand the reasoning behind a rule and feel included in its implementation. The aim is to help them understand that these limits are not about restricting their freedom, but about protecting their health, sleep, and overall wellbeing. 

Start with the ‘Why’ of Wellbeing 

Begin with a calm conversation focused on health. Explain that screens at night can interfere with the body’s natural sleep signals, making it harder to fall asleep and feel rested the next day. You could say, “I really want you to wake up feeling refreshed so you have more energy for school and the things you enjoy.” This frames the discussion around their personal benefit. 

Involve Them in Creating the Routine 

Instead of imposing a rule, invite your child to help create the new routine. Ask for their input on what a reasonable time would be to put screens away for the night. While you, as the parent, will guide the final decision to ensure it is healthy, giving them a voice in the process creates a sense of ownership and cooperation that dramatically reduces resistance. 

Establish a Clear, Predictable Routine 

A predictable routine is essential. This should include a set time when all devices are placed in a central charging spot outside of the bedroom. It is helpful to pair this with a relaxing and enjoyable pre-bed activity, such as reading a book, listening to an audio story, or sharing a quiet moment of dua together. This creates a positive alternative to screen time. 

Maintain a Tone of Care, Not Control 

The language you use matters immensely. Instead of falling back on phrases like, “Because I said so,” consistently use words that link the boundary back to your love and concern. A gentle reminder like, “Remember, this is part of looking after our bodies so we feel our best,” reinforces the true intention behind the rule. 

When boundaries are consistently framed as an act of loving support, children will eventually see them as such, rather than as an assertion of parental control. 

Spiritual Insight 

In the Islamic tradition, the way we manage our nights is a reflection of how we manage our lives. The Sunnah encourages ending the day in a state of peace and remembrance, and any habit that disturbs that tranquil rhythm should be approached with wisdom and care. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Furqaan (25), Verse 47: 

‘And it is He (Allah Almighty) Who has designated for you the night as a cover (for respite), and sleep for your rejuvenation; and designated the day for re-energising (the Earth with automated light energy)…’ 

This beautiful verse teaches us that the night is a divine gift, specifically designed by our Creator for rest, replenishment, and renewal. 

It is recorded in Sunan Nasai, Hadith 2344, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The most beloved prayer to Allah is the prayer of Dawud, and the most beloved fast to Allah is the fast of Dawud. He would sleep half the night, stand in prayer for a third of it, and sleep for a sixth of it.’ 

This hadith shows that even in the context of night worship, which is highly encouraged, the principle of balance and the body’s need for rest is valued and protected. By framing night-time screen limits as a way of honouring the body’s need for rest and protecting the heart’s peace, you nurture both the physical health and the spiritual balance in your child’s life.