How do I repair things when both of us were angry and said things we regret? 

Parenting Perspective 

Starting with Modest Ownership 

The fallout can feel complicated when both the parent and the child lose control. Repair, however, necessitates the willingness to reconnect rather than the complete untangling of all the threads at once. Start with a statement of modest ownership: I apologise for the things I said when I was upset. I believe we both became overburdened. Let us give it another go. This exemplifies shared accountability without reducing it to guilt or blame. 

Collaborative Repair 

With the use of a drawing, a feeling chart, or a brief narrative, assist your child with naming their experience as well: Can you show me how our fight felt? Next, establish a modest ritual that represents a new beginning, such as sharing a warm beverage, lighting a candle, or placing hands over hearts. The nervous system learns to identify repair with safety and intimacy through these easy, repetitive actions. Discuss what you two could do differently the next time: I want to take a moment before speaking the next time I feel that angry. What could be useful to you? Involving your child in that process, even if they are very young, helps them develop emotional literacy. The lesson becomes evident: relationships can bounce back from breakups, and love endures through difficult times.

Spiritual Insight 

Islam views reconciliation as a sign of genuine faith, not just something to be encouraged. Allah Almighty states in Surah Al Hujuraat (49), Verse 10: 

‘Indeed, the believers are brothers (to each other); so, make peace with your brothers… ‘

Every relationship, including that between a parent and child, is covered by this lesson. The act of returning with mercy is elevated by both the Sunnah and the honourable Quran, particularly when both parties have erred. It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, Hadith 1924, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ stated: 

‘The merciful are shown mercy by Ar-Rahman. Be merciful on the earth, and you will be shown mercy from Who is above the heavens. ‘

Resolving disagreements amicably is a sign of strength derived from spiritual humility, not weakness. You are teaching your child how to ask for forgiveness, re-establish safety, and demonstrate Divine mercy in interpersonal relationships you are not only handling a dispute. You welcome the kindness of Allah Almighty into your house and into your parenting journey when you reconcile in a gentle manner.