Parenting Perspective 

It can be a painful realisation that the glow of a screen has been stealing precious time away from your spouse and child. When this becomes a regular pattern, your loved ones can be left feeling second-best and quietly resentful. Repairing this requires more than just an apology; it means actively rebuilding trust with consistent actions that prove they are your main priority. 

Step 1: Acknowledge the Harm Clearly 

Begin by addressing the issue directly and sincerely. You could say, ‘I know I have been choosing my phone over you lately, and that was wrong. You deserve my full attention’. Naming the mistake shows that you are taking responsibility and not just brushing it aside. 

Step 2: Make Tangible Changes 

Your words must be followed by concrete actions. Put physical boundaries in place, such as charging your phone outside the bedroom, having tech-free family meals, or creating dedicated ‘no-screen’ windows of time in the evening. These actions prove that you are serious about changing your habits. 

Step 3: Reinvest with Intentional Presence 

You must actively replace the lost time with activities that are centred on connection. This could include reading a book aloud, going for a family walk, or having a short nightly chat with your spouse. Presence needs to be felt, not just promised. 

Step 4: Invite Accountability 

Show your humility and commitment by asking for help. You could say to your spouse, ‘If you see me slipping back into old habits, please gently remind me’. Allowing them to help you stay on track demonstrates the sincerity of your effort. 

Step 5: Rebuild Trust Gradually 

Trust may not return instantly. It is consistency over time that truly repairs the damage. Being available, listening properly, and following through on your promises will do more to heal the relationship than a single grand gesture. 

By combining a sincere apology with concrete changes and steady presence, you can transform your regret into a deeper and more trusting connection with your family. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam reminds us that our time and attention are a sacred trust (amānah), and that our families have a right over them that must not be neglected. Screens, much like wealth or work, are merely tools. When they begin to take precedence over people, they become a source of spiritual loss. 

A Quranic Reminder on Distractions 

The Quran warns us that being consumed by worldly distractions, whatever form they may take, leads only to regret. We must realign our priorities before it is too late. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Takaathur (102), Verses 1-2: 

‘Are you diverted by the obsession of infinite (worldly wealth)? Until such time as you observe the place of your demise (on this Earth). ‘ 

This serves as a powerful reminder that we must focus on what has lasting value. 

The Prophetic Standard of Family Excellence 

The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ taught that the true measure of a Muslim’s character is how they treat their own family. 

It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, Hadith 3895, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The best of you is the best to his family, and I am the best of you to my family.’ 

This teaches us that our excellence in Islam is measured by how we are with our families, not by the time we spend with our devices. 

By admitting your mistake, placing firm limits on your screen time, and reinvesting in being present, you are fulfilling your duty as a spouse and parent. Your loved ones will feel honoured again, and your children will grow up knowing that love and attention are lived values, not just words.