Parenting Perspective 

Set Clear and Simple Rules 

While nagging might achieve temporary results, it rarely builds lasting respect for rules. For a rule to stick, a child needs clarity and consistency. It helps to begin with a few simple, clear rules that everyone can understand and even post them somewhere visible. Instead of constantly repeating yourself, you can use a gentle cue, like pointing to the rule chart or asking, ‘What is our family rule about this?’ This gently shifts the responsibility back to the child. 

Use Calm Consequences and Positive Reinforcement 

When a rule is broken, it is important to implement the agreed-upon consequence calmly and without a long lecture. For example, if screen time runs over, simply remove the device and say, ‘We can try again to follow the rule tomorrow.’ Equally, be quick to offer praise for positive behaviour: ‘I noticed you finished your game as soon as the timer went off; that shows great responsibility.’ This teaches children that rules are consistent and not just dependent on a parent’s mood. 

Build Respect Through Consistency 

By combining clear expectations with calm consistency, you build respect for rules without nagging or shouting, making family life more peaceful and cooperative. This approach fosters a sense of security and trust within the home. 

Spiritual Insight 

Kindness Wins Hearts, Not Harshness 

Islam teaches that guidance should be delivered with mercy and patience, not anger. The Quran praises the gentle character of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ, explaining that his leniency was a mercy from Allah that drew people towards him. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Aalai Imran (3), Verse 159: 

‘So, it is by the mercy from Allah (Almighty) that you (O Prophet Muhammad ﷺ) are lenient with them; and if you had been harsh (in your speech) or restrained (in your heart), they would have dispersed from around you…’ 

Good Character is a Sign of Complete Faith 

The prophetic tradition teaches that a believer’s faith is perfected through their character. This is a powerful reminder for parents that any discipline must be tied to good manners, not anger or frustration. 

It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, 1162, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The most complete of the believers in faith are those with the best character.’ 

Discipline Tempered with Mercy 

When you model calmness and fairness while enforcing rules, your children learn that discipline is about respect, not about fear. This approach not only makes the rules more effective but also nurtures an atmosphere of harmony and barakah in the home.