How do I host high-energy play without anyone getting singled out? 

Parenting Perspective 

Hosting high-energy games and activities can easily descend into chaos, teasing, or exclusion if the play is not structured in a thoughtful way. Children often thrive on a sense of competition, but they can struggle to manage the emotional side of it. As a host, your role is to channel that energy into an atmosphere of laughter, fairness, and belonging. The goal is to make sure every child leaves feeling safe, seen, and part of the group. 

Set the Tone Before Play Begins 

Before the games begin, gather everyone for a quick, upbeat huddle. Smile and say, ‘Today is all about having fun and working as a team, so everyone gets a chance to shine.’ Framing the purpose of the play as connection, not victory, helps to set the right emotional tone from the start. 

Mix the Teams Intentionally 

If the games involve teams, it is best not to let the children select the teams themselves. Instead, you can mix them up using playful methods, such as counting off in numbers or drawing names out of a hat. This helps to prevent existing social hierarchies from dictating the teams and makes the process of inclusion feel natural, not forced. 

Build in Moments of Equal Opportunity 

It is a good idea to design games where the advantage rotates, so that quieter or slower children are also valued. 

• In a game of tag, make sure to change the person who is ‘it’ often. 

• In an obstacle course, you can cheer for the funniest moves, not just the fastest ones. 

• In team relays, you can celebrate creativity: ‘That was the best silly run!’ 

Use “Energy Breaks” to Reset the Mood 

Children can often lose their sense of empathy when they become overexcited. Plan for natural pauses every ten to fifteen minutes for a drink or a calmer task. You can say, ‘We are taking a quick power-up break now. Even superheroes need to rest!’ 

Model How to Notice Feelings 

If you notice one child looking left out or upset, you can name it gently in a way that includes them: ‘It looks like Sam is catching his breath. Let us all give him a cheer when he joins back in.’ This normalises giving and receiving support. 

End with a Sense of Shared Pride 

Gather everyone together at the end for a group “well done.” You can hand out small, equal tokens like stickers or fruit pops. The message you are sending is that the real value is in the effort and the spirit of the game, not in dominance. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam celebrates the kind of joy that uplifts people’s hearts, not the kind of competition that bruises them. True play should strengthen bonds and teach self-control, echoing the Prophet’s ﷺ perfect balance of enthusiasm and mercy. 

Upholding Dignity in Play 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Hujuraat (49), Verse 11: 

‘Those of you who are believers, do not let a nation ridicule another nation, as perhaps it may be that they are better than them…’ 

This verse reminds us that teasing or exclusion, even in the context of play, can undermine a person’s dignity. When we respect each child’s worth, we turn a moment of fun into an act of worship, because we are honouring the equality that Allah Almighty has created among us. 

It is recorded in Sunan Nisai, Hadith 5379, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The most beloved of people to Allah are those who are most beneficial to the people.’ 

This teaches that spreading joy, fairness, and comfort to others, even in a simple game, is an act that brings a person closer to Allah Almighty. 

Before the games begin, you can make a light-hearted dua together: ‘O Allah, please let our play bring smiles and safety to everyone.’ You can tell the children that being gentle, taking turns, and cheering for one another are all ways to earn a reward from Allah.