How do I help them find comfort in one or two friends instead of many? 

Parenting Perspective 

Many children feel an unspoken pressure to be popular or to have a large group of friends. When they only have one or two close companions, they may begin to think that it means they are less liked or somehow less important than their peers. In reality, deep and meaningful friendships are often far more valuable than numerous shallow ones. Your role as a parent is to help your child value quality over quantity, and to find contentment in the immense blessing of sincere companionship. 

Acknowledge Their Feelings 

If your child expresses sadness by saying, “I only have one friend,” it is important to respond with gentle understanding: 

• ‘I know it can sometimes feel like other children have more friends, but having even one good friend is a huge blessing.’ 

• ‘It is okay not to be surrounded by many people. One loyal friend can often mean more than a whole crowd.’ 

By validating their worry, you open the door for your reassurance to be heard and accepted. 

Reframe Their Friendship Expectations 

Teach your child that friendship is not about numbers, but about sincerity and connection: 

• ‘It is much better to have one friend who truly cares about you than ten who would not stand by you in a difficult time.’ 

• ‘What really matters is who treats you with kindness and respect, not how many people gather around you.’ 

This helps to shift their focus away from chasing popularity and towards valuing genuine bonds. 

Highlight the Strength of Small Circles 

Show them the many advantages that come from having fewer but closer friends: 

• They are able to trust and share their feelings more deeply. 

• There is often less drama or social pressure to “fit in.” 

• They have the opportunity to learn what true loyalty feels like. 

You can gently point out: ‘With one or two real friends, you never have to pretend to be someone you are not.’ 

Encourage a Healthy Social Balance 

While you are celebrating their close friendships, also gently guide them to remain kind and open to other people: 

• Encourage them to offer polite greetings and make small talk with other classmates, even if they are not close friends. 

• Remind them: ‘You do not have to be close friends with everyone, but you can still be respectful and kind to all people.’ 

Make a point of praising them for showing kindness to others beyond their immediate circle, even in very small ways. 

Build Belonging Outside of Friendships 

• Encourage them to join group activities where they can feel included without the pressure to form many close friendships. 

• Strengthen your family bond so they feel secure in the knowledge that their core sense of belonging is always safe at home. 

• Remind them that their self-worth does not depend on the approval of their peers. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches us to value sincere companionship over large numbers of acquaintances. A single loyal and righteous friend is far more beneficial than a large group of friends who might distract us from goodness. Teaching your child this perspective helps them to appreciate and nurture the good friends they do have. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Furqaan (25), Verses 27–28: 

‘And on the Day (of Judgement), those imbued in the darkness (of their ignorance and immorality) shall bite their hands, and shall say: “How I wish I had adopted the pathways taught to me by the Messenger. Woe be unto me, how I wish that I had not taken so-and-so as a friend.’ 

This powerful verse warns us about the profound impact of choosing the wrong friends, reminding us that one good companion is infinitely better than a multitude of harmful ones. 

It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 2101, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The example of a good companion and a bad companion is that of the carrier of musk and the one blowing the bellows. The musk carrier either gives you some, or you buy from him, or you find a pleasant smell from him. The bellows either burn your clothes or you find an offensive smell from him.’ 

This hadith perfectly highlights the power of even a single good companion to bring benefit into our lives, and the harm that can come from bad company, no matter how large the group. 

By sharing these teachings, you help your child to find a sense of pride and peace in having one or two true friends. They will come to understand that sincerity, loyalty, and kindness matter far more than having a large number of friends. 

Over time, they will grow into a young person who values depth over popularity, builds genuine bonds, and takes comfort in knowing that even a small circle of good friends is a precious gift from Allah Almighty, one that strengthens both their heart and their faith.