How do I help them bring a small idea that adds to play instead of taking over? 

Parenting Perspective 

Many children, especially those who are highly imaginative, can have wonderful ideas during their playtime. However, their enthusiasm can sometimes lead them to dominate the game rather than simply contributing to it. They might try to change the game entirely or insist that the other children must follow their new idea, not realising that they have shifted from joining in to taking over. Teaching your child how to offer their ideas in a way that adds to the play, rather than controlling it, can help them to develop a sense of cooperation, empathy, and social harmony. 

Begin by Celebrating Their Creativity 

It is a good idea to start from a place of affirmation. You can tell your child, ‘You have such great ideas when you play. That is a real strength.’ Children need to feel that their imagination is valued before they can learn how to manage it. Once they feel appreciated, you can add, ‘Let us practise how to share your ideas so that everyone can enjoy them.’ This helps to turn a moment of correction into one of growth, not of criticism. 

Explain the Concept of ‘Adding, Not Changing’ 

You can use simple language to help them to draw a distinction between these two concepts. You might say, ‘When we add to a game, we are helping to make it better. When we change it completely, the other children might feel that their own ideas do not matter.’ You can then model the difference for them with some clear examples. 

• Changing: ‘Let us stop being pirates now. It is a superhero game!’ 

• Adding: ‘What if the pirates find a secret map that leads to some superhero treasure?’ 

By showing them this contrast, either visually or through pretend play, your child can begin to see how their imagination can blend with the ideas of others, rather than having to replace them. 

Practise the ‘Small Step’ Rule 

You can teach your child to share just one small idea at a time, instead of their whole grand plan. You could say, ‘Before you share a big idea, try giving just one little piece of it and see if the other children like it.’ For instance, in a building game, they could suggest, ‘Can we add a bridge over here?’, rather than saying, ‘Let us build a whole new city over here!’ This gradual approach teaches them a sense of emotional pacing, of how to gauge the interest of others, to adapt, and to respond to their feedback. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches that the qualities of wisdom and humility are inseparable. When a child learns to add their ideas to a situation in a gentle way, instead of taking it over, they are practising adab, a set of beautiful manners that are rooted in a deep consideration for others. The ability to share our ideas with a sense of balance is a reflection of our inner discipline, a quality that is beloved by Allah Almighty. 

The Blessing of Consultation and Cooperation 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Shuraa (42), Verse 38: 

‘ And those people that respond to (the commandments of) their Sustainer, and establish prayer, and conduct their affairs between each other through consultation, and spend (generously) from the sustenance We have provided them.‘ 

This verse celebrates the principle of shura, or consultation and shared decision-making. Even among the believers, decisions should be made together, not imposed by just one person. When your child learns to share their small ideas rather than trying to direct the other children, they are reflecting this divine principle in miniature. 

The Prophetic Example of Gentle Leadership 

It is recorded in Sunan Nisai, Hadith 5379, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The most beloved of people to Allah are those who are most beneficial to others.’ 

This hadith reminds us that true goodness lies in bringing benefit to others, not in dominating them. When your child is able to add an idea that helps the other children to enjoy their play, they are offering a real benefit, a small but significant act of kindness in action. The holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ exemplified a form of leadership that was exercised through humility, listening, and inclusion. 

Guiding your child to add their ideas to a situation, instead of taking it over, teaches them more than just a social skill; it helps to build their character. They can learn that their imagination is a gift that should be shared, not one that should be used to control other people. It becomes a living lesson in humility, patience, and the art of shared joy. 

Your encouragement and your gentle correction will help them to see that being a good friend means creating space for the voices of others as well as their own. Every time they are able to wait, to listen, and to offer a small addition to the game, they are learning how to build a sense of harmony, whether it is in their play, in their family life, or in their future teamwork. 

Spiritually, these small acts are immense. They teach your child that leadership in Islam begins with an attitude of service, that true creativity is what lifts other people up, and that a sense of kindness in our collaboration with others is a mirror of the grace of our faith itself.