How do I help my child understand that it is okay to cry sometimes? 

Parenting Perspective 

Tears Are Not a Sign of Weakness 

Many children feel embarrassed or ashamed when they cry, especially if they have been told to ‘be brave’ or ‘stop crying’ in the past. Yet crying is a healthy way to release big feelings. You can help your child see that tears are not a sign of weakness, but a sign that their heart needs to release sadness, worry, or even frustration. When your child cries, stay close. Avoid saying, ‘Do not cry.’ Instead, use gentle words like, ‘It is okay to cry. I am here with you.’ This simple reassurance teaches your child that their tears are safe with you. 

Talk About Crying During Calm Moments 

Talk about crying in calm moments too. Use storybooks or your own examples: ‘Sometimes I cry when I feel very sad or tired. It helps me to feel better inside.’ Praise your child for sharing their feelings rather than bottling them up. If they feel shy about crying in front of others, teach them that they can find a quiet place or come to you for comfort. Over time, they will learn that tears do not make them less strong; in fact, knowing when to let emotions out makes them more resilient. Your calm acceptance of their tears builds trust that they never have to hide their big feelings at home. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches us that tears can be a mercy from Allah Almighty. Even the strongest hearts weep when emotions overflow. Allah Almighty reminds us in the noble Quran at Surah Al Israa (17), Verse 109: 

‘And they fall on their faces, weeping, as this increases their humility.‘

This verse shows that tears can soften the heart and bring us closer to Allah Almighty. 

It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 426, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ: 

‘wept when he felt deep emotion and did not see tears as a weakness. ‘

When you tell your child that crying is allowed, you echo this Sunnah of mercy. Encourage them to make a small Dua when they feel tears coming: ‘Ya Allah, calm my heart and help me feel safe.’ This reminds them that Allah Almighty knows every tear that falls and that crying can wash away the heavy feelings inside. By making crying safe in your home, you help your child see that being soft-hearted is not something to hide but a blessing that keeps their soul close to Allah Almighty’s mercy.