Parenting Perspective 

Unspoken social rules, such as waiting for someone to finish speaking or not standing too close to others, can be particularly confusing for neurodivergent children. While their neurotypical peers often absorb these cues intuitively, they may require clear, direct teaching and patient reinforcement. The goal is to equip them with the tools and structure they need to feel confident in social situations, without becoming overwhelmed. 

Make the Invisible Visible 

It is essential to break down abstract social rules into clear, simple, and concrete steps. For example, you could explain, ‘When someone is talking, we watch their face and wait until they have stopped before we give our answer.’ Using visual aids, social stories, or cue cards can be an effective way to remind your child of what is expected in a particular setting, making the invisible rules visible. 

Practise with Role-Playing 

Acting out common social scenarios at home provides a safe and low-pressure environment for your child to practise. You can rehearse situations like greeting a guest, waiting in a queue, or taking turns in a dinner table conversation. This repetition helps to build familiarity and reduces the anxiety they might feel in real-life situations. 

Reinforce Progress with Praise 

Acknowledge and praise even the smallest efforts your child makes. A simple, positive comment like, ‘I really liked how you waited for your turn before you started speaking,’ is very encouraging. This positive reinforcement helps them understand that learning these rules is a gradual process of growth, not a quest for immediate perfection. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches that respect, patience, and kindness must be extended to all people, with a special recognition that individuals have different abilities and face different challenges. 

The Duty of Giving Attention to All 

The Quran itself contains a powerful reminder of the importance of giving patient attention to every individual, regardless of their condition or how they communicate their needs. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Abasa (80), Verses 1–2: 

‘ (The holy Prophet Muhammadﷺ) frowned and redirected (his attention to another conversation) when there came to him a blind man (interrupting his conversation)…’ 

This passage, referencing an occasion involving the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ, serves as a universal lesson that every person who seeks guidance deserves our time and patience. 

The Prophetic Value of Gentleness 

The prophetic tradition consistently places a high value on gentleness, especially when teaching or guiding others, as this approach is beloved to Allah. 

It is recorded in Sunan Ibn Majah, Hadith 3689, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Allah is gentle and loves gentleness in all matters.’ 

By approaching your neurodivergent child with patience, clarity, and gentleness, you are embodying this core Islamic principle. Over time, you can help them learn to navigate the social world with greater confidence, secure in the knowledge that their unique journey is embraced within the vast mercy of Islam.