How do I handle situations where one child finishes chores and earns screen time, while the other is too young to understand the concept? 

Parenting Perspective 

When one child earns a privilege like screen time through completing their chores, while a younger sibling is not yet old enough to grasp the concept of ‘earning’ things, it can easily lead to frustration and feelings of unfairness. The goal is to maintain a sense of justice that respects both children’s different developmental stages. 

Explain the Connection in Simple Terms 

With your younger child, avoid complex explanations. Instead, use short, clear, and consistent phrases that link the action to the reward. You could say, “Your brother helped with the tidying, so now it is his turn for the tablet.” Over time, through simple repetition, they will begin to make the connection between effort and privilege, even before they can fully articulate it. 

Offer a ‘Parallel’ Special Activity 

While the older child enjoys their earned screen time, offer your younger child their own special, age-appropriate privilege. This is not a reward for a chore, but an acknowledgement of their need for engagement. It could be an extra story with you, time with a favourite toy, or a special colouring activity. This ensures the younger child still feels included and valued, preventing feelings of being left out. 

Use Visual Cues to Build Understanding 

If possible, create a simple family chart where chores and their corresponding rewards are displayed visually. Even if the younger child cannot read, pictures and stickers can help them to slowly understand the process. Seeing the older sibling put a star on their chart and then get screen time makes the concept of earning tangible and easier to grasp. 

Praise the Effort, Not Just the Reward 

Make a point of celebrating the older child’s completion of their chores with warm, verbal praise before you even mention the screen. Say something like, “Thank you so much for your hard work, that was very helpful.” This teaches both children that the effort and contribution are valuable in and of themselves, separate from any reward that might follow. 

By balancing clear explanation with inclusion and consistency, you can navigate these moments without resentment, while teaching both children valuable lessons about effort and fairness. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam encourages fairness and teaches that rewards should be given with wisdom, taking into account the ability, understanding, and developmental stage of each individual. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Najam (53), Verse 39: 

‘And they shall be nothing (to account) for mankind except what he has undertaken…’ 

This verse establishes a powerful principle: effort and striving are the basis for reward. By linking a privilege like screen time to a completed responsibility, you are teaching your older child this fundamental Islamic concept in a practical, everyday way. 

It is recorded in Sunan Nasai, Hadith 2057, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Whoever is mindful of what Allah has commanded, Allah will protect him in this world and the Hereafter.’ 

This hadith speaks to the blessings that come from fulfilling our responsibilities. Consistently completing chores is a small-scale lesson in this greater principle of accountability and its rewards. By tailoring privileges in a way that matches each child’s level of understanding, you nurture fairness, avoid unnecessary conflict, and lay the groundwork for them to value effort as a lifelong principle.