How do I handle older children mocking younger ones’ treasures? 

Parenting Perspective 

Understand why children mock 

When an older child teases a younger sibling for their ‘treasures’, such as a pebble collection, a worn-out toy, or a drawing, it often reflects curiosity mixed with immaturity rather than actual cruelty. For the younger child, however, such mockery can be deeply hurtful. Their small belongings often carry large emotional meaning, representing pride, imagination, or love. The older sibling may not grasp that these objects represent their brother or sister’s inner world. Before correcting the behaviour, it is helpful to understand both sides: one child may be seeking validation through teasing, while the other seeks recognition through their attachments. 

Model respect for sentimental value 

Parents can begin by validating the younger child’s feelings, saying something like, ‘That toy is special to you, and it is okay to care about it’. Then, calmly guide the older one to see beyond the surface: ‘When you laugh at what is special to your brother, it hurts his feelings. You may not find it valuable, but he does’. Short, clear reasoning works better than lengthy lectures. Model this respect by handling your children’s items carefully yourself. When a parent treats even a child’s scribble with honour, siblings learn by observation that value is not measured by its price tag. 

Teach empathy and emotional intelligence 

Use these moments as opportunities to teach empathy. Ask the older sibling questions that encourage reflection: 

• ‘How would you feel if someone laughed at your favourite hoodie or game?’ 

• ‘Why do you think your sister keeps that shell?’ 

Such questions encourage emotional awareness and humility. Praise the older child when they shift from mocking to kindness. Reinforcement works best when it is linked to identity. You might say, ‘That was thoughtful of you to appreciate her things. That is how good big brothers act’. 

Create routines that build respect 

You can create a family ritual that strengthens appreciation for the small joys of others. Once a week, invite each child to share one thing they love and explain why it is special to them. Everyone must listen without interrupting. Over time, this practice teaches that respect is not selective; it applies even to things we do not personally understand. It also helps older children realise that kindness makes them leaders. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches that mocking or belittling others, even slightly, wounds the heart and can fracture community bonds. Within families, this principle begins at home. Parents must cultivate adab (refined manners) so that older siblings learn to use their strength for protection, not humiliation. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Hujuraat (49), Verse 11: 

‘Those of you who are believers, do not let a nation ridicule another nation, as perhaps it may be that they are better than them…’ 

This verse directly condemns mockery, reminding believers that a person’s true worth is known only to Allah Almighty. A child who treasures a broken toy with love may hold more sincerity in their heart than one who mocks it. Teaching this concept early helps children to anchor respect in taqwa (God-consciousness), not in material judgment. 

The holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ treated the possessions and emotions of others with deep gentleness, regardless of their age or status. 

It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, Hadith 1924, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘He is not one of us who does not show mercy to our young ones and respect to our elders’. 

This Hadith captures the moral architecture of a healthy family. The older sibling’s strength is meant to shield, not to shame. By sharing this with your children, you give the older one a role of honour; a role of stewardship, not superiority. Encourage them to become guardians of kindness, reminding them that mercy is a mark of spiritual maturity. 

When parents weave these teachings into daily conversations, for example, by saying, ‘We do not laugh at others; we protect their hearts’, they nurture homes filled with gentleness. The younger child learns that their feelings matter, and the older one realises that true strength is found in tenderness, not teasing. Over time, the family’s tone shifts. Laughter remains, but never at the expense of another’s joy. This transformation does more than preserve peace; it mirrors the prophetic vision of brotherhood, where every heart, no matter how small, is safe.