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How do I handle eye-rolling and sighing without escalating? 

Parenting Perspective 

Eye-rolling and sighing are typically non-verbal expressions of frustration, boredom, or a child testing boundaries, rather than outright defiance. The most effective initial response is to remain calm and observe without reacting immediately. Your composure is crucial as it sets the emotional tone for the interaction. Responding with irritation will likely reinforce the behaviour, whereas a measured and curious approach can transform a tense situation into a valuable teachable moment. 

Click below to discover meaningful books that nurture strong values in your child and support you on your parenting journey

Name the Behaviour Without Judgement 

Address the action in a neutral, observational tone. For instance, say, “I noticed you just rolled your eyes. Can you help me understand what is bothering you?” This simple script shifts the focus from blame to understanding. It opens a dialogue about their feelings and gives your child a constructive opportunity to articulate their frustration instead of acting it out non-verbally. 

Set Clear Expectations for Respect 

Clearly reinforce the family rule that all communication must remain respectful, even during disagreements. A useful phrase is, “It is perfectly okay for you to feel frustrated, but in our family, we speak to each other politely.” This approach of pairing validation with a boundary is crucial. It teaches children that while all their emotions are valid, disrespectful behaviour is not an acceptable way to express them. 

Offer Alternative Outlets 

Proactively teach your child structured ways to manage and release their tension. Suggest alternatives like taking a short walk to cool down, writing their thoughts in a journal, or simply taking a deep breath before speaking. Providing them with healthy coping strategies helps to reduce instances of non-verbal defiance and significantly strengthens their long-term emotional regulation skills. 

Spiritual Insight 

Responding with Patience and Dignity 

Islamic teachings place immense emphasis on self-restraint, especially when faced with provocation or disrespect. Eye-rolling or sighing, while seemingly small gestures, can test a parent’s patience. Yet, the true strength of character lies not in overpowering the child but in maintaining calm authority and grace. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Aalai Imran (3), Verses 134: 
‘…They suppress their anger; and are forgiving to people; and Allah (Almighty) loves those who are benevolent.’ 

This verse beautifully highlights that restraint in moments of frustration is not weakness, but an act of goodness beloved to Allah Almighty. When a parent calmly addresses non-verbal defiance with understanding and discipline, they model the same composure and mercy that the Quran encourages. Such restraint turns correction into compassion, teaching children that respect can coexist with emotional honesty. 

Modelling the Prophetic Way of Calm Correction 

The holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ consistently demonstrated patience, even when confronted with disrespect or frustration. His responses were marked by calmness, empathy, and gentle guidance — never humiliation or anger. 

It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 6114, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 
‘The strong is not the one who overcomes people by his strength, but the one who controls himself when angry.’ 

This hadith reframes strength as emotional regulation — a vital lesson for both parents and children. By staying composed and inviting reflection instead of punishment, parents exemplify true leadership and mercy within the home. 

Cultivating Respect Through Emotional Control 

When children witness their parents respond to eye-rolling or sighing with patience, empathy, and firm boundaries, they learn that emotional maturity is not about suppression but about mindful response. This nurtures self-awareness and respect in them, aligning their conduct with Islamic values of gentleness (rifq) and humility (tawadu). Over time, such moments of calm correction become opportunities for both parent and child to grow in emotional intelligence and spiritual strength. 

Click below to discover meaningful books that nurture strong values in your child and support you on your parenting journey

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