How do I explain to my child what I am feeling in a way that helps them learn about emotions without oversharing? 

Parenting Perspective 

Filtering, Not Faking 

Children must witness genuine emotions, but in a controlled and secure manner. You are filtering for their age and emotional maturity, but you are not protecting them from all emotions. Try stating something modest but honest, like, I feel tired, and a bit upset because today was hard, rather than, I am so overwhelmed and everything is going wrong. However, I am trying to be nice and taking some deep breaths. 

Modelling Emotional Regulation 

This aids in the development of your child’s internal permission and emotional vocabulary: I can feel and deal with anything if my parents can. Use straightforward terms like excited, disappointed, nervous, or frustrated, and occasionally follow them up with your actions. This exemplifies emotional regulation in parenting, which involves managing emotions rather than only experiencing them. 

The Goal: Normalizing Feelings 

Refrain from assigning the child to provide care. You do not have to be stoic, but you also should not let your child feel in charge of making you feel better or calming you down. Say something like, I love you and I am working through it, so do not worry. These simple, straightforward check-ins promote stability and assist in normalising feelings. This emotional support eventually turns into a silent teaching tool. Your child discovers that having emotions is a natural aspect of being resilient and human. 

Spiritual Insight 

The holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ shown to us that faith does not fail when emotion is acknowledged. He sobbed, grieved, and expressed his weariness and sadness, but he never unfairly burdened others. The noble Quran records the words of Prophet Yaqub (AS) in Surah Yusuf (12), Verse 86: 

“I am only complaining to Allah (Almighty) of my anguish and heartache…“

Although it is addressed primarily to the One who has the power to cure, this verse supports emotional honesty. It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 1303, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ wept at the death of his infant son and said: 

“The eyes are shedding tears, and the heart is grieved, but we will not say except what pleases our Lord.” 

When emotions are controlled, purposeful, and accompanied by faith, they are not burdens but rather opportunities for spiritual growth. In addition to guiding your child, you are also fulfilling a Sunnah clothed in dignity when you share a bit of your own emotional labour with them.