Parenting Perspective 

Children naturally learn to respect close family members, but they often need guidance to extend that same courtesy to teachers, neighbours, and other adults in their community. The goal is to help them understand that respect is not just a family rule, but a universal principle of good character that strengthens their connection to the wider world. 

Explain Respect as a Universal Value 

Talk to them in simple terms about good manners. You can say, ‘Just as we show respect to Nani at home, we also show respect to our teachers at school by listening, and to the shopkeeper by saying thank you.’ This helps them see the consistent thread of good conduct. 

Connect Respect to Empathy 

Help them understand how respect makes others feel. Ask them, ‘How do you feel when an adult smiles and speaks kindly to you? That is how others feel when you are respectful to them.’ This links the concept of respect to the positive emotion of making someone feel valued. 

Model and Reinforce Respect Daily 

Your daily actions are their most powerful lesson. When they see you greet neighbours warmly, speak politely to service staff, and show deference to elders, they learn that respect is a lived, everyday practice. Acknowledge their own efforts with praise to reinforce the habit. 

Build a Foundation of Good Character 

By teaching them that respect extends beyond your front door, you are doing more than teaching manners. You are helping them build a foundation of good character, raising them to be individuals who bring kindness and dignity into every space they enter. 

This approach nurtures a child who is not only well-behaved at home but is a respectful and valued member of their broader community. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches a comprehensive ethic of respect that extends far beyond the immediate family. Good manners towards all people are a reflection of a Muslim’s faith and a key part of their character. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Nisa (4), Verse 36: 

‘ And worship Allah (Almighty) only, and do not ascribe to anything instead of Him (Allah Almighty); (which amounts to  icon worshipping/paganism); and with parents (proceed with them favourably), and with close relatives and friends and impoverished (people); and your neighbour that is close to your neighbourhood, and the neighbour that is remote from you; and the companion by your side and the traveller and those (women) that are legally bound to you; indeed, Allah (Almighty) does not love those who are deceitful and arrogant.‘ 

This beautiful verse provides a comprehensive list of those deserving our good conduct, explicitly including neighbours, companions, and travellers. It teaches us that our circle of care must be wide. 

It is recorded in Sunan Abu Dawood, Hadith 4843, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Part of glorifying Allah is honouring a grey-haired Muslim, the one who has knowledge of the Quran, and a just ruler.’ 

This profound hadith elevates the act of honouring an elder to the status of glorifying Allah Himself. It shows that showing respect to adults in the community is not just a social duty but a deeply spiritual act. 

By helping your child see that respect applies to all adults, you are connecting everyday manners to Islamic values. Over time, they will learn that showing courtesy is not just about family discipline but about honouring Allah Almighty through their character in every interaction.