How can parents respond if their teen is embarrassed by them asking ‘basic’ questions about tech? 

Parenting Perspective 

It is a common experience for parents when a teenager rolls their eyes or shows embarrassment at what they consider to be a ‘basic’ question about an app, game, or device. While this reaction usually stems from immaturity rather than malice, it can still leave a parent feeling dismissed and excluded. The goal is to transform these moments into opportunities for mutual respect and learning, without allowing a child’s embarrassment to undermine family bonds. 

Stay Calm and Normalise Learning 

Respond with calm composure, not defensiveness. You could say: ‘Everyone has to start somewhere. I was not born knowing these things, and neither were you.’ This normalises the learning process and shows that asking questions is a part of growth, not a weakness. 

Use Their Knowledge as an Opportunity for Bonding 

Invite them into the role of teacher by saying: ‘Since you seem to understand this better than I do, I would like you to explain it to me.’ This reframes their expertise as a responsibility, not a reason to be arrogant. This approach helps them to feel proud of their knowledge while also learning the value of humility. 

Correct Disrespect Gently but Firmly 

If their embarrassment turns into outright rudeness, it is important to calmly set a boundary. You can say: ‘It is fine that you know more about this than I do, but it is not okay to be disrespectful. In our family, respect is never optional.’ This makes it clear that their knowledge does not give them a license to abandon good manners. 

Reaffirm Parental Wisdom 

Gently remind your teenager, either directly or indirectly, that while they may be the expert on a particular platform, you as a parent carry a lifetime of experience in other crucial areas. They still rely on you for guidance on relationships, values, and faith, which are the areas where real wisdom is most needed. 

By modelling confidence, gently correcting disrespect, and turning their knowledge into a shared responsibility, parents can help their teenagers to learn that embarrassment is misplaced, and respect is always required. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches that knowledge, no matter how great, should never be a cause for arrogance or mockery. The duty to show respect towards one’s parents remains absolute, regardless of any differences in skill or generational knowledge. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Israa (17), Verses 23: 

‘ And your Sustainer has decreed that you do not worship anyone except Him Alone; And (treat) parents favourably; whether one of them or both of them reach old age in your lifetime; then do not say to either of them ‘Uff’ (an expression of disrespectful frustration) and do not admonish them; and talk to them with kind words.‘ 

This verse powerfully reminds us that even the most minor expressions of disrespect or irritation towards parents are forbidden. Kindness and honour must always guide our interactions with them. 

It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, Hadith 1921, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘He is not one of us who does not show mercy to our young ones and respect to our elders.’ 

This teaching establishes that a person’s character as a believer is measured not by their cleverness or technical skill, but by their humility and their respect for others, especially their elders. 

By grounding these moments in the principles of faith, parents can teach their children that while embarrassment might be a natural feeling, it should never be allowed to cross the line into disrespect. Over time, children can learn that knowledge is a true blessing only when it is paired with good adab (manners), and that showing respect to their parents is in itself a profound act of worship.