How can parents handle tech rules differently for siblings of different ages without causing resentment? 

Parenting Perspective 

Applying different rules to children of different ages is a normal and necessary part of parenting. The key to doing it successfully, especially with screen time, is to be transparent, fair, and focused on each child’s individual needs. 

Explain the Reason Behind Different Rules 

Children naturally compare themselves to their siblings, so it is vital to explain clearly why the rules are different. You could say, ‘Your older brother has more screen time because he has shown he can manage his homework first. As you get older and show more responsibility, your limits will change too.’ This frames the difference as a matter of readiness, not favouritism. 

Give Each Child Age-Appropriate Privileges 

Fairness means meeting each child’s developmental needs, not giving everyone the exact same thing. Tailor the limits and content permissions to each child’s age and maturity. This avoids restricting an older child unnecessarily or overwhelming a younger one with freedoms they are not ready for. 

Create Shared Rules Where Possible 

To foster a sense of unity, establish some core rules that apply to everyone equally. Having shared, non-negotiable boundaries, such as no devices at the dinner table, reinforces that you are one family team, even if some individual privileges differ. 

Handled openly, this approach teaches children that fairness in family life is about recognising differences while still protecting relationships. 

Spiritual Insight 

In the Islamic tradition, fairness (‘adl) means giving each person their due according to their individual needs, rights, and circumstances. It does not mean treating everyone identically. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Hujurat (49), Verse 13: 

‘Indeed, the most noble of you in the sight of Allah is the most righteous of you…’ 

This teaches us that a person’s worth is based on their good character and consciousness of God, not on their age or the privileges they are given. 

It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 2587, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Fear Allah and treat your children justly.’ 

This reminds us that justice between our children requires careful thought, ensuring that no child feels overlooked while also recognising that different ages require different approaches. By explaining your age-based rules with clarity and kindness, you model this beautiful Islamic principle of justice.