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How can I tune into my child’s feelings without them needing to explain everything? 

Parenting Perspective

Children often lack the vocabulary to articulate their emotions, but their actions speak for themselves. To tune in, one must be aware of body language, tone, changes in routine, and even quiet. It also entails allowing such feelings to surface in a healthy manner without hurrying to correct or rationalize them. To make your child feel emotionally ‘seen,’ use a gentle tone, an invitation such as ‘I noticed you seem a bit quiet today,’ or just sit next to them. Trust is developed through this type of attunement. It teaches kids that their feelings are already being heard, and they do not need to ‘perform’ them in order to be acknowledged.  

Spiritual Insight

The holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ had a keen awareness of people’s inner states and frequently offered guidance before anyone asked. This practice of emotional awareness is an extension of Rahmah (mercy) and Ihsan (excellence). It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 2319, that holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ stated: ‘He who shows no mercy to the people, Allah Almighty, the Exalted and Glorious, does not show mercy to him.’ Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Qasas (28), Verse 77: ‘…and show favour (onto others) as Allah (Almighty) has shown favour upon you…’ The ability to sense need, even when it is not expressed, is a necessary component of emotional kindness. We honour our children as souls bestowed to us by Allah Almighty, not only as dependents, when we quietly pay attention to their emotions and rhythms. It turns into a kind of reverence to tune in.  

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