Parenting Perspective 

For a child with ADHD, the brain’s ‘braking system’ for speech is often still developing, making it incredibly difficult to hold back comments. This impulsivity is not a sign of disrespect, but a neurological reality. Our role is not to punish them for this, but to compassionately equip them with practical strategies that make self-control more achievable. 

Use Clear and Predictable Signals 

Children with ADHD often respond well to clear, external cues. Agree on a simple, discreet signal like a gentle tap on the shoulder or a raised hand that means ‘please wait’. Practising this in calm moments helps them internalise the connection between the signal and the action of pausing. 

Provide Tools to Channel Their Energy 

Instead of demanding that they simply hold a thought, give them a place for it to go. A small fidget tool, a doodle pad to write or draw their thought on, or even the option to whisper it to themselves can help manage the immediate impulse to interrupt. 

Praise the Effort, Not Just the Outcome 

Focus on celebrating their small victories. If they successfully use a signal or wait even for a few seconds, acknowledge it warmly: ‘I saw you wait for your turn just then. That was excellent self-control!’ Positive reinforcement is far more effective than focusing on their slip-ups. 

Build Skills Through Scaffolding 

These strategies are not about expecting perfection, but about providing support. By using signals, tools, and praise, you are building a scaffold around their developing self-control. This not only improves communication at home but gives them vital skills they can use at school and with friends. 

This compassionate and structured approach helps your child develop practical skills for self-regulation, building their confidence and strengthening your connection. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam is a religion of ease and compassion, recognising that every individual has unique challenges. When guiding a child who struggles with impulse control, our approach should be rooted in mercy and gentleness, not harshness. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Baqarah (2), Verse 286: 

‘Allah (Almighty) does not place any burden on any human being except that which is within his capacity; bearing the (fruits of the) goodness he has earnt, and bearing the (consequences of the) evil he has earnt (in the worldly life)…’ 

This foundational verse is a profound source of comfort. It reminds us that Allah understands our individual capacities and limitations. It is a divine call for us to show the same understanding and compassion towards our children. 

It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 6927, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Allah is gentle and loves gentleness in all matters.’ 

This beautiful hadith establishes gentleness (rifq) as a divine attribute that Allah loves. Applying this principle when parenting a child with extra challenges is a direct way of embodying a quality beloved by God. 

By supporting your child with compassion and structure, you show them that their struggles do not define them. Over time, they learn that practising self-control is not just about good manners but also about embodying patience and gentleness, values beloved to Allah Almighty.