Parenting Perspective 

Set the Right Tone Before Playing 

When family games become constant battles over ‘who is best,’ the joy is quickly lost. The solution is to reshape how success is defined. Before playing, clarify that the purpose is to have fun and connect as a family, not to prove who is superior. Setting a clear ground rule like, ‘We will only play as long as everyone is respectful,’ creates a clear boundary and shows that good character is valued more than victory. 

Introduce Cooperative Play 

It is also helpful to rotate competitive games with cooperative ones where teamwork is essential for success. Activities like completing a large puzzle or cooking a meal together teach children that achievement can come from supporting each other, not just from winning as an individual. 

Redefine What You Praise 

Parents should avoid making direct comparisons like, ‘You are the fastest.’ Instead, praise the effort and character shown during the game: ‘I really liked how you took turns so patiently,’ or, ‘It was great how you kept trying even when it was difficult.’ When children learn that recognition comes from good behaviour, not just from winning, the need to be ‘the best’ will naturally decrease. 

Spiritual Insight 

Humility Earns the Hereafter 

Islam discourages arrogance and any rivalry that is rooted in pride. The Quran reminds us that seeking to elevate oneself over others in this world is a damaging trait, and the best outcome is reserved for the righteous and humble. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Qasas (28), Verse 83: 

‘ The abode of the Hereafter – We (Allah Almighty) have made it for those people who do not desire greatness in worldly status in their life on Earth, nor do they spread (immoral) anarchy; and the Hereafter is a (reward) for the virtuous.’ 

Be Humble, Not Boastful 

The prophetic tradition commands believers to practise humility in their interactions. This ensures that no one oppresses or boasts over another, which is the root cause of unhealthy rivalry. This applies even in light-hearted family games. 

It is recorded in Sunan Abu Dawood, 4895, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Allah has revealed to me that you must be humble, so that no one oppresses another or boasts over another.’ 

A Source of Connection, Not Rivalry 

By reminding your children that games are about togetherness and that humility is beloved to Allah, you can redirect their focus away from simply proving who is best. This helps them to enjoy the act of playing, strengthen their sibling bonds, and practise virtues that will shape their character far beyond the game itself.