How can I model respect in my own interactions to influence my child? 

Parenting Perspective 

Show Respect in Your Daily Interactions 

Children learn far more from what they see than what they are told. To raise a respectful child, you must first demonstrate respect in your own daily interactions. This means speaking kindly to everyone, from relatives to shopkeepers, even in stressful situations. At home, it is vital to model a respectful relationship between parents, avoiding sarcasm or dismissiveness. Children will always mirror the behaviour they see most often. 

Acknowledge Mistakes and Show Humility 

Part of being respectful is admitting when you are wrong. If you lose your temper, a sincere apology to your child ‘I am sorry, I should not have spoken so harshly’ teaches them a powerful lesson about humility and taking responsibility. It is just as important to highlight respectful behaviour when you see it in them: ‘It was very respectful of you to wait for your cousin to finish speaking.’ This positive affirmation reinforces the value of good manners. 

Make Respect Second Nature 

When respect is woven into your behaviour, your child sees it as the normal way to interact with people, both within the family and beyond. By consistently demonstrating and affirming respect, you create an environment where it becomes second nature. 

Spiritual Insight 

Respect Begins in the Home 

Islam places great emphasis on good manners (adab), considering them a sign of strong faith. This character development begins in the home, with the Quran specifically commanding good and respectful treatment towards parents. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Israa (17), Verse 23: 

‘ And your Sustainer has decreed that you do not worship anyone except Him Alone; And (treat) parents favourably…’ 

Good Character Perfects Faith 

The prophetic tradition teaches that the most complete believers are those with the best character. This is a profound reminder that our manners, our patience, and the respect we show to others are not separate from our faith, but are a direct reflection of it. 

It is recorded in Riyadh Al Saliheen, 278, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The most perfect believer in faith is the one who is best in character.’ 

A Reflection of Islamic Identity 

When you model respect in all your actions, you teach your child that faith is not just about prayer and fasting, but is also about how we treat other people. This instils a deep understanding that respect is both a core family value and a beautiful reflection of their Islamic identity.