Parenting Perspective 

When guests are present, your own child can either become competitive and disruptive, or they can act as a calm and steady role model. Involving your child as a helper not only makes visits run more smoothly but also strengthens their sense of responsibility. The key is to give them small, age-appropriate roles that make them feel important and helpful, without being overwhelming. 

Give Clear, Positive Roles 

Before your guests arrive, assign your child a simple and positive task. You could say, ‘You can be in charge of showing your friend where to put their shoes,’ or ‘You will be my special helper in setting the table today.’ Giving them clear instructions helps to set them up for success and gives them a sense of purpose. 

Praise Calm Leadership 

When you notice your child helping to guide another child respectfully, acknowledge their effort with quiet praise: ‘I really liked how you kindly reminded your friend about our rule.’ This reinforces the idea that calmness and kindness are valued leadership qualities, not bossiness. 

Model Togetherness 

Encourage your child to demonstrate the household routines rather than directly correcting their friends. For example: ‘Let’s show your cousin how we tidy the toys together when we are finished playing.’ This approach frames their role as that of a helpful partner rather than an enforcer, which helps to keep the relationships warm and positive. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches that those who are older or more capable have a duty to guide others with gentleness, mercy, and kindness. This principle applies beautifully to the role of a child acting as a host or a helpful older sibling in the home. 

Cooperation in Righteousness 

The Quran commands believers to cooperate with one another in all things that are good and righteous, which includes helping others to follow positive household rules. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Maaidah (5), Verses 2: 

‘…And participate with each other to promote righteousness and piety, and do not collaborate in the committal of any sin or moral transgression…’ 

Mercy Towards the Young 

The prophetic tradition makes it clear that showing mercy and respect is central to all family interactions, with older children expected to lead with kindness, not harshness. 

It is recorded in Riyadh Al Saliheen, Hadith 355, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘He who does not show mercy to our young ones, or acknowledge the rights of our elders, is not one of us.’ 

By involving your child as a calm helper, you are reflecting the Islamic values of mercy, cooperation, and leadership through kindness. Your child learns that helping others respectfully is not only good manners but is also a beautiful way of living their faith in their daily life.