Parenting Perspective 

When a toddler shouts ‘stop!’, it is rarely a sign of defiance. More often, it is a raw expression of big feelings they cannot yet name. Their limited vocabulary and developing self-control mean a loud shout is the quickest way to get their point across. Our role is to calmly offer them better tools to express themselves. 

Model the Right Words 

When they shout, you demonstrate. Calmly get down to their level and say, ‘Let us try that again with kinder words. We can say, “Please stop, I do not like that.”’ Your consistent, gentle modelling is their most effective lesson. 

Practise Through Play 

Playtime is the perfect rehearsal space. Use their dolls or toy cars to act out small conflicts. You can make one toy grab something and then model the other toy saying, ‘I was playing with that. Please may I have it back?’ This makes the language feel natural before they need it in a real situation. 

Praise Every Effort 

When you hear them use a softer tone or a polite phrase, even if it is not perfect, celebrate it immediately. A warm, ‘I love how you used your kind words just then!’ makes them feel proud and encourages them to do it again. 

Respond with Calm Consistency 

If they revert to shouting, avoid frustration. Acknowledge the feeling behind the shout: ‘I can tell you are feeling frustrated. Remember our kind words?’ Your patience teaches them that calm communication is more effective than shouting. 

Through this gentle process of modelling and practice, you give your toddler powerful new tools, helping them see that kind words can achieve far more than a loud shout. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches that the words we choose are a reflection of our character and have the power to create harmony. By guiding a child towards gentle speech, we are planting the earliest seeds of beautiful Islamic manners (adab). 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Israa (17), Verse 53: 

‘And inform My servants that they should speak in only the politest manner (when they speak to the extremists in disbelief); indeed, Satan is (always ready for) infusing anarchy between them, as indeed, Satan is the most visible enemy for mankind.’ 

This verse reminds us that choosing the best words is a form of protection, safeguarding our relationships from the discord that Satan seeks to create. 

It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, Hadith 2002, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Nothing will be heavier on the Day of Resurrection in the scale of the believer than good character. Allah hates the one who utters foul or coarse language.’ 

This beautiful hadith shows that gentle and respectful speech is not merely a social grace but an act of worship that carries immense weight in the sight of Allah. 

By nurturing your toddler’s ability to use kind words instead of shouting, you are not only teaching emotional skills but also raising them with values beloved to Allah Almighty.