How do I encourage my child to return borrowed items promptly? 

Parenting Perspective 

Children may sometimes delay or neglect the return of borrowed items because the concepts of timeliness and respect for others’ belongings are still developing. Parents should begin by acknowledging the common underlying reasons for this behaviour. It is natural for a child to feel busy, distracted, or unsure how to manage the social etiquette involved. 

Validating these emotions can reduce defensiveness and open the door for learning. For example, one may say, “I understand it can be easy to forget when you have so many things to do.” By framing the lesson as part of trust-building rather than solely focusing on punishment, you help the child to internalise responsibility. 

Create Clear Expectations 

Establish explicit, simple rules for any borrowed item. This could involve assigning a specific return date or integrating a routine, such as placing borrowed materials in a dedicated tray or basket at home immediately upon arrival. Encourage your child to make a mental or written note, linking the required action to their developing organisational skills. 

Parenting Script: “Let us check the tray together each evening to see what needs returning tomorrow.” 

This approach transforms the process of accountability into a practical, manageable habit rather than a punitive lecture. 

Positive Reinforcement and Reflection 

It is essential to praise consistent behaviour. Acknowledge when your child returns items on time to reinforce their sense of pride and reliability. Should a delay occur, encourage reflection and problem-solving instead of resorting to scolding. 

Guiding Reflection: “What could we do differently next time to make sure this goes back promptly?” 

This fosters their sense of responsibility, develops practical organisational skills, and cultivates empathy for the owner of the borrowed item. 

Spiritual Insight Fulfilling Trusts as a Mark of Faith 

In Islam, fulfilling trusts and returning what belongs to others are not small acts — they are among the clearest indicators of faith and integrity. When a child learns to promptly return borrowed items, they are being trained in one of the core moral foundations of Islam: amana (trustworthiness). Parents can frame this lesson not as a rule of politeness but as an act of worship. By returning something on time, a believer honours both the rights of others and the command of Allah Almighty. This connection transforms a routine task into an act of spiritual obedience. 

The Quranic Command to Honour Trusts 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Nisa (4), Verse 58: 
‘Indeed, Allah (Almighty) commands you to execute all trusts to their rightful owners; and when you (are asked to) judge between people, that you should judge with justice…’ 

This verse is a timeless reminder that trust is sacred. Whether it involves money, belongings, or promises, a believer’s duty is to safeguard and return what has been entrusted to them. For children, returning a borrowed book, toy, or school supplies is a small but significant way to live this verse in action. Parents can explain that Allah Almighty loves those who act responsibly and justly, even in small matters. Each returned item becomes a reflection of reliability — a quality that strengthens both faith and social bonds. 

The Prophetic Model of Trustworthiness 

It is recorded in Sunan Ibn Majah, Hadith 35, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 
‘Whoever takes something on trust and returns it faithfully, Allah will record it as a good deed.’ 

This hadith shows that fulfilling an amana is not merely a social courtesy but a means of earning reward from Allah Almighty. The holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ, known even by his enemies as Al-Amin (the Trustworthy), embodied this principle throughout his life. Parents can use this example to teach children that trustworthiness is one of the most beautiful traits of a believer — a quality that earns both respect from people and blessings from Allah Almighty. 

Building Lasting Habits of Integrity 

When parents link these daily acts of responsibility to faith, they help their child internalise integrity as a natural part of being Muslim. Encouraging routines — such as keeping a “return basket” or checking borrowed items together — strengthens the habit, while connecting it to intention elevates it spiritually. Over time, children learn that small acts of reliability build great character. Returning something borrowed becomes more than good manners; it becomes a daily act of honesty, gratitude, and accountability before Allah Almighty.