How do I interpret weekly tummy aches that vanish on non-school days? 

Parenting Perspective 

When a child’s tummy aches consistently appear on school mornings but disappear on weekends, it is often a sign of underlying anxiety rather than a physical illness. This pattern suggests a psychosomatic response, where emotional stress manifests as physical discomfort. Recognising this allows you to shift from worry to a supportive, problem-solving approach. 

Observe Patterns and Triggers 

Keep a simple journal to observe patterns. Note when tummy aches occur and what is happening at school that week, such as tests, social events, or a heavy workload. Look for specific triggers, like rushed mornings or conflict with peers. A simple script to start the conversation could be: ‘I have noticed your tummy tends to hurt before school. Let’s try to figure out together if something on those days is making you feel worried’. 

Validate Without Dismissing 

Even if the pain is stress-related, it is a real physical sensation for your child. It is crucial to validate without dismissing their experience. Acknowledge their feelings with empathy: ‘I understand your tummy feels sore right now, and I know it is uncomfortable. It sounds like mornings are feeling a bit stressful’. This approach builds trust and shows them you are on their side, which is the first step toward finding a solution. 

Collaborate on Solutions 

Work with your child to find ways to reduce their morning anxiety. Brainstorm ideas together, which empowers them and gives them a sense of control. You could collaborate on solutions such as preparing their school bag the night before, waking up a little earlier to avoid rushing, or practising a simple deep-breathing exercise in the car on the way to school. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam encourages attentiveness to both the physical and emotional well-being of our children, reflecting the holistic and compassionate care of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Tawbah (9), Verses 51: 

‘Say (O Prophet Muhammad ﷺ): “No calamity (or difficulty) shall ever befall upon us, except what has been decreed by Allah (Almighty); He is our Lord, and so the believers place their full reliance upon Allah (Almighty)”.’ 

This verse reminds parents to place their ultimate trust in Allah, which can ease their own anxiety about their child’s well-being. This trust, however, is paired with the responsibility to take proactive and compassionate action to support the children in our care. 

It is recorded in Mishkat Al Masabih, Hadith 4995, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The best of you is he who is best to his family, and I am the best among you to my family.’ 

By observing patterns, validating feelings, and gently collaborating on solutions, parents are embodying this prophetic guidance. You are being the ‘best’ to your family by creating an environment where a child feels supported, safe, and capable of managing their anxiety constructively.