What should I do when older siblings mock a younger one’s reading or speech? 

Parenting Perspective 

It is deeply painful to witness an older child laugh as their younger sibling stumbles over a word or reads slowly. For the younger child, this mockery can be crushing, turning a moment of effort into one of embarrassment and shame. The older sibling may see it as harmless teasing, but it is a quiet erosion of confidence and trust. As a parent, your role is twofold: to protect the vulnerable child’s dignity and to teach the older one empathy. What is at stake is not just reading fluency, but the development of kindness, patience, and moral maturity. 

Intervene Immediately but Calmly 

When the mocking occurs, you must step in straight away, not with anger, but with clear and gentle authority. 

You can say, ‘We do not laugh at someone who is learning. In this family, we help each other grow.’ Your calm firmness establishes a non-negotiable moral boundary. It is crucial to avoid shaming the older child in return, as this only perpetuates a cycle of humiliation. Instead, correct the behaviour with composure, showing that dignity is restored through respect, not retaliation. 

Protect the Younger Child’s Confidence 

Immediately turn your attention to the younger sibling and offer reassurance in front of everyone. 

For instance, say, ‘You are learning so well, and everyone makes mistakes when they are growing.’ This public affirmation sends a clear message to the younger child that they are safe and that their efforts are valued. It also signals to the older sibling that your home protects effort, not perfection. If the child seems upset or unwilling to continue, gently end the activity and work on rebuilding their confidence later in private. 

Teach the Older Sibling Empathy 

When emotions have settled, speak to the older child alone. Ask open questions to encourage reflection: 

• ‘How do you think your sibling felt when you laughed at them?’ 

• ‘Do you remember what it was like to learn something new and find it difficult?’ 

The goal is not to scold but to awaken genuine empathy. Explain that teasing during moments of effort teaches shame, whereas kindness teaches courage. You might add, ‘If you want to help your sibling become a better reader, encouragement will work far better than mockery.’ Challenge them to take on a more supportive role by asking, ‘Next time, can you try to help instead of laugh?’ This reframes their responsibility as one of leadership, not punishment. 

Create a Culture of Safe Learning 

Empower the older child to be a positive model by giving them a constructive role, such as being the ‘reading helper’. When they perform this role well, offer specific praise: ‘That was very kind of you; you corrected them so gently.’ This redefines their sense of strength, showing that true maturity lies in protecting others, not mocking them. Normalise mistakes throughout your home by modelling vulnerability yourself and openly admitting your own small errors with humility and good humour. 

Follow Through with Fair Consequences 

If the mockery persists despite your guidance, apply a calm and logical consequence. For example: ‘You have lost your reading-helper privileges for today because you were not using them kindly.’ The goal is not to punish harshly, but to remind them that privileges are earned and come with responsibility. 

When you protect one child’s confidence while guiding another’s conscience, you are not just solving a sibling issue; you are shaping moral awareness. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam places immense value on speech that uplifts rather than wounds. To mock someone’s struggle, especially in the pursuit of knowledge, contradicts the principles of mercy and humility. Every word we utter has moral weight, and every child’s dignity is a trust from Allah Almighty. Teaching siblings to support rather than shame each other reflects one of the most profound Islamic values: adab, or refined manners that protect the heart. 

The Prohibition of Mockery in the Quran 

Mockery is never harmless; it offends both human dignity and divine command. When we stop our children from ridiculing their sibling’s efforts, we are nurturing humility and compassion, two traits beloved by Allah. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Hujuraat (49), Verse 11: 

‘Those of you who are believers, do not let a nation ridicule another nation, as perhaps it may be that they are better than them…and do not insult each other; and do not call each other by (offensive) nicknames…’ 

The Prophet’s ﷺ Mercy Towards Learners 

The prophetic example calls upon all of us, parents and children alike, to embody mercy. The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ uplifted those who struggled, encouraged them with gentleness, and never mocked their mistakes. 

It is recorded in Sunan Abu Dawood, Hadith 4943, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘He who does not show mercy to our young, nor honour our elders, is not one of us.’ 

When an older sibling learns to mirror this merciful attitude, they are not only fostering family harmony but are also practising a beautiful prophetic tradition. 

By calmly intervening to stop mockery, you teach your children that the home is not a stage for humiliation but a sanctuary for learning. The older sibling learns that true strength lies in gentleness, and the younger one learns that their effort is valued more than perfection. This approach builds not just peace, but a home culture where learning is safe, laughter uplifts, and the mercy of Allah is reflected in every interaction.