What small roles build leadership through service, not status? 

Parenting Perspective 

Many children are naturally drawn to leadership roles, such as being the line leader, team captain, or group spokesperson. These positions can be exciting, but without careful guidance, a child may begin to see leadership as simply being in charge, rather than as an opportunity to serve others. True leadership is not about power or attention; it is about responsibility, humility, and putting the needs of the group first. As a parent, you can teach your child that even the smallest, quietest roles can build leadership skills if they are rooted in service. 

It is helpful to remember that children often equate leadership with visibility, thinking that the loudest or most central role is always the most important. To reshape this view, you can help them to discover that service roles, though often less glamorous, are essential, respected, and deeply rewarding. 

Introduce Small Service Roles 

Start by encouraging your child to take on roles that prioritise responsibility over recognition. 

• Tidying leader: putting away equipment or making sure the space is left clean for the next group. 

• Welcoming helper: greeting newcomers and helping them to feel settled and included. 

• Time-checker: gently reminding the group when it is time to move on to the next activity. 

• Organiser: making sure that everyone in the group has the right materials. 

• Encourager: noticing when someone is being left out and kindly drawing them back in. 

Emphasise That Service Is Leadership 

You can say to your child: ‘Leaders do not just stand at the front. A true leader is someone who makes sure that no one is left behind, that the space is cared for, and that everyone feels included. Those are the jobs that build real respect.’ This helps them to see that leadership is not about status, but about lifting others up. 

Create Opportunities to Practise at Home 

You can create small roles within the family to practise this principle. 

• One child can be responsible for clearing the table. 

• Another can be in charge of checking if everyone has water at dinnertime. 

• A third can be the one to welcome any guests at the door. 

Praise Their Attitude, Not Their Position 

When your child takes on one of these service roles, be sure to praise the character trait behind it: ‘I really liked how you helped to set up the chairs so quietly before anyone else had arrived. That shows real leadership, because you were caring for others before thinking of yourself.’ 

Use Role-Play to Illustrate 

Act out a classroom or team scenario where one child tries to take charge, while another helps quietly in the background. Afterwards, you can reflect together by asking: ‘Which one of those people would you rather have as your leader?’ 

Mini Dialogue Example 

Child: ‘But I want to be the team captain, not just the helper.’ 

Parent: ‘I know. Being the captain is an important job, but true captains know how to serve first. Even helping to set out the cones or welcoming a new child to the team is an act of leadership. People always respect those who serve.’ 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches us that leadership is a trust (amanah), not a privilege. Those who are given a position of leadership must serve others with humility, and should not seek the position for the sake of status. Teaching children to value small roles of service prepares them for this sacred responsibility. 

Leadership Is a Form of Service 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Hajj (22), Verse 41: 

‘(And they are) those people, that if We (Allah Almighty) were to accommodate them on the Earth; they would establish their prayers, and make the benevolent donations – Zakah, and promote positivity (of good deeds), and forbid from the negativity (of bad deeds); and with Allah (Almighty) rests the final outcome of all matters.’ 

This verse shows that true authority is about taking on responsibility, serving others by upholding justice and goodness. You can explain: ‘Leadership means doing what is best for other people, not just enjoying a title.’ 

The Best Leaders Are Guardians 

It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 7138, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The leader of a people is a guardian, and he is accountable for his subjects.’ 

This hadith reinforces the idea that leadership is not about status, but about responsibility and service. You can explain to your child: ‘A true leader is someone who takes care of other people. Even small jobs like tidying up or welcoming someone are ways of being a guardian for the group.’ 

By connecting these small service roles to their faith, you show your child that serving others with sincerity is a far greater achievement than chasing after titles. Over time, they will learn that true leadership is not about being noticed, but about being trustworthy, humble, and of benefit to others.