How can I model forgiveness after reacting emotionally? 

Parenting Perspective 

Even the most patient parents can sometimes react emotionally, whether by raising their voice or speaking more harshly than intended. What matters most is how you handle the recovery. By modelling forgiveness, both for yourself and towards your child, you can show them that mistakes do not have to define a relationship, and that repairing a connection is a vital part of respect. 

Acknowledge and Apologise Sincerely 

If you have reacted in a way you regret, it is important to admit it openly and honestly. You could say, ‘I should not have raised my voice to you earlier. I was feeling very upset, but I want to handle it better next time.’ This demonstrates to your child that admitting a mistake is a sign of strength, not weakness. 

Reset With Forgiveness 

Once you have both calmed down, make it clear that your relationship is secure. A simple statement like, ‘We both had a difficult moment, but I love you and we can start fresh now,’ can be very reassuring. This helps to prevent grudges from forming and teaches your child that your home is a place of mercy. 

Teach Through Example 

By forgiving your child and also seeking forgiveness for your own shortcomings, you are showing them how to handle their own mistakes with humility. They learn from your example that forgiveness is not just something you talk about, but a value that is lived out in your daily interactions. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches that humility, forgiveness, and making amends are essential components of a believer’s character. A parent who models these qualities after a moment of anger is teaching a powerful lesson in spiritual maturity. 

Forgiveness as a Path to God’s Mercy 

The Quran reminds us that forgiving others, even when we have been hurt, is a path to receiving the mercy and forgiveness of Allah Himself. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Noor (24), Verses 22: 

‘…And forgive (their mistakes) and overlook (their weaknesses); do you not love the fact that Allah (Almighty) may forgive you? And Allah is Most Forgiving and Most Merciful.‘ 

The True Meaning of Strength 

The prophetic tradition teaches that real strength is not found in dominance, but in self-restraint. Part of this strength is having the humility to seek forgiveness after a moment of weakness. 

It is recorded in Al Adab Al Mufrad, Hadith 1317, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The strong person is not the one who overcomes others, but the strong person is the one who controls himself when angry.’ 

By modelling forgiveness after you have reacted emotionally, you are connecting your parenting to the core Islamic values of mercy and humility. Your child learns that even when emotions run high, relationships can be healed through apology and patience, which strengthens both their faith and your family bond.