How Can I Build a Habit of Calling or Visiting Elder Relatives as a Kind Act? 

Parenting Perspective 

In today’s busy world, it is easy for children to become absorbed in their immediate circle of school, friends, and activities, sometimes forgetting the importance of reaching out to elder relatives. Building a consistent habit of calling or visiting grandparents, aunts, and uncles is a beautiful way to teach children about gratitude, respect, and the importance of family connection. It strengthens their sense of identity and reminds them that they are part of a wider, loving family network. 

Establish a Predictable Family Ritual 

One of the most effective ways to build a habit is to make it a predictable part of your family’s routine. You could set a specific day or time for making calls or visits, for example, ‘Every Sunday afternoon is our special time to call Grandma and Grandpa.’ This consistency transforms the act from a random, easily forgotten task into a cherished and expected ritual. 

Keep the Interactions Short and Simple 

For younger children especially, the idea of a long conversation can be daunting. Keep the expectation simple and manageable. Encourage them to say a short salaam, ask one simple question, or share one piece of news from their week. This approach makes the habit feel easy and achievable, rather than overwhelming. 

Model the Joy of Maintaining Ties 

Your own attitude towards this practice will be the most powerful teacher. Show your child your genuine enthusiasm for connecting with family. You might say, ‘I am so looking forward to our call with Auntie today; hearing her voice always makes me happy. Let us see how she is doing.’ Your warmth and joy teach them that reaching out to family is not a burden, but a privilege and a source of happiness. 

Encourage Active Participation During Visits 

During visits to relatives, guide your child to be an active and thoughtful participant. You can encourage them to perform small acts of service, such as offering a drink or a snack, sitting quietly to listen to a story, or giving a warm hug and salaam upon arrival and departure. This practical involvement makes the experience more meaningful and memorable for them. 

Connect Their Actions to the Positive Outcome 

After a call or visit, take a moment to reflect with your child on the positive impact of their actions. You could say, ‘Did you see how happy Grandpa was when you told him about your drawing? Your call really brightened his day.’ Connecting their small effort to the visible joy it brings others helps them to truly value the habit. 

By embedding these small rituals into your family life, children learn that calling and visiting their elder relatives is not just a duty, but a powerful way to spread love, show respect, and strengthen the bonds of family. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam places a great and solemn emphasis on the importance of maintaining the ties of kinship (silat ar-rahim), especially with one’s elders. By encouraging children to regularly call or visit their relatives, you are training them from a young age to live out this sacred duty with kindness and consistency. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Muhammad (47), Verses 22–23: 

‘Then if by any chance you (O hypocrites) were given authority (to govern); you would cause (immoral) anarchy on the Earth and sever your ties of association (focused only on self-interest). These are the people who have earned the curse of Allah (Almighty); then they become deaf (to the voice of reason), and their vision is blinded (by self-obsession). ‘ 

This powerful verse serves as a stark warning against the dangers of neglecting family ties. It shows that maintaining these connections is not merely a matter of good manners, but is in fact a crucial component of one’s faith. 

It is recorded in Al Adab Al Mufrad, Hadith 56, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Whoever wishes to have his provision expanded and his life prolonged, let him maintain the ties of kinship.’ 

This beautiful hadith teaches children that reaching out to their family members is not only an act of kindness but is also a direct means of bringing blessings, abundance, and goodness into their own lives. 

When children make a regular habit of calling or visiting their elder relatives, they are practising an act that brings joy to human hearts, strengthens the unity of the family, and earns a great reward from Allah. Over time, they will learn that kindness is not something that is limited to their own home, but is a light that extends to their wider family as a beautiful reflection of their faith.