How do I guide them when copied behaviour looks funny but is harmful? 

Parenting Perspective 

It can be a confusing situation for a parent when a child copies a behaviour that elicits laughter but is actually unsafe or unkind. You might even find yourself smiling initially, but it is important to remember that children interpret laughter as approval. What seems amusing in the moment can easily become an ingrained habit, making clear and consistent guidance essential. 

Avoid Reinforcing with Laughter 

Children are driven to repeat actions that get a response. If you or others laugh, they will naturally believe the behaviour is acceptable and even desirable. 

• It is crucial to maintain a calm and neutral expression. 

• State clearly: ‘I know that seemed funny, but that action could hurt or upset someone.’ 

• Immediately redirect them to a safe and positive alternative activity. 

Help Them Understand the Impact 

Provide your child with short, simple explanations that directly connect their actions to the consequences. This clear and repeated reasoning helps a child to properly understand the impact of their behaviour. 

• ‘When you copy that move, someone could accidentally get hurt.’ 

• ‘Using that word might make your friend feel sad.’ 

• ‘Funny things should make everyone feel happy, not worried.’ 

Offer Positive Outlets for Humour 

Often, children who copy harmful behaviours simply enjoy making people laugh. It is important to channel this desire for a positive reaction into safer, more constructive forms of expression. 

• Encourage them to tell jokes, do silly dances, or make funny faces. 

• Celebrate their ability to be playful and funny in a way that brings genuine smiles without causing any harm. 

• Offer praise: ‘That was such a fun and kind way to play. You made us all so happy!’ 

Model Respectful Humour 

Demonstrate through your own behaviour that the best kind of humour is rooted in kindness, not ridicule or harm. Share gentle jokes with your family, laugh at your own small mistakes, and highlight moments where humour brings people together joyfully. By combining gentle firmness with positive encouragement, you can help your child retain their playful spirit while learning to avoid unsafe habits. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam guides us to find joy and humour in ways that are balanced, kind, and respectful to others. 

Guidance from the Quran 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Hujuraat (49), Verses 11: 

‘Those of you who are believers, do not let a nation ridicule another nation, as perhaps it may be that they are better than them…’ 

This powerful verse reminds us that any humour or imitation that involves ridicule is inappropriate for a believer. Instilling this principle in children from a young age helps them understand that kindness must always be the guiding force in their play and interactions. 

Guidance from the Hadith 

It is recorded in Al Adab Al Mufrad, Hadith 252, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Do not laugh excessively, for too much laughter kills the heart.’ 

This hadith teaches the importance of balance. While Islam does not forbid laughter and humour, it cautions against excess and any form of amusement that is harmful. By guiding your child towards safe and balanced humour, you are nurturing both their spiritual heart and their social etiquette. Through calm correction and consistent encouragement, you teach your child that their sense of humour can be a beautiful gift one that uplifts others, brings joy, and reflects the quality of mercy that is so beloved by Allah.