How can I teach them that even small copied habits can hurt relationships? 

Parenting Perspective 

Children often assume that small habits a dismissive sigh, an eye-roll, a teasing remark, or ignoring someone are harmless. When they copy these behaviours from peers or media, they may not realise the long-term impact. Over time, however, these seemingly minor actions can erode trust and respect within relationships. Your role is to help them understand that strong and healthy relationships are built on a foundation of respect, which is shown in small, everyday actions just as much as in grand gestures. 

Why Small Habits Matter 

Gently explaining the significance of these small actions helps your child to become more mindful. You can explain that: 

• Seemingly tiny dismissive gestures can make others feel ignored or undervalued. 

• Repeated negative behaviours, no matter how small, form patterns that begin to shape a child’s character. 

• What feels playful to the child who is doing it may feel genuinely painful to the person on the receiving end. 

Use Real-Life Examples 

Show them how small, repeated actions can add up over time. 

‘Imagine if every day a friend ignored you when you said hello. The first time might not matter, but after a week, you would start to feel sad and unappreciated.’ 

These simple, relatable examples make the lesson real and understandable for a child. 

Encourage Reflection 

When your child copies a small but disrespectful habit, pause the moment and invite them to reflect. 

‘How do you think that made your sister feel just now when you sighed like that?’ 

This develops their empathy and helps them to connect their small actions to their sibling’s feelings. 

Replace with Positive Habits 

Guide them towards small, positive actions that actively strengthen relationships. Encourage them to practise habits such as: 

• Smiling when someone is speaking to them. 

• Consistently saying “thank you” and “excuse me.” 

• Listening patiently without interrupting. 

Celebrating these small but powerful gestures shows your child how to build warmth and closeness. 

Reinforce With Praise 

Whenever your child chooses a small act of kindness or respect, acknowledge it. 

‘I noticed that you said thank you to your teacher without me having to remind you. That shows real respect and makes people feel valued.’ 

By consistently teaching them that small habits have a big impact, you help your child understand that relationships thrive on tiny, daily acts of respect. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches that even the smallest actions, whether of kindness or of harm, carry immense weight. Believers are encouraged to be mindful not only of their major deeds but also of the seemingly minor habits that shape their hearts and their relationships with others. 

No action is too small to be recorded and weighed by Allah. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Zalzalah (99), Verses 7–8: 

‘ Thus, everyone’s actions equivalent to the measurement of an atom that is good shall be observed by them (on the Day of Judgment). And everyone’s actions equivalent to the measurement of an atom that is wicked shall be observed by them (on the Day of Judgment).‘ 

This powerful verse reminds us that every word, gesture, and habit matters in the sight of Allah. There is no such thing as a harmless bad habit. 

Even the smallest gesture of goodwill is a significant and valuable deed. 

It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 2626, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Do not belittle any good deed, even meeting your brother with a cheerful face.’ 

This hadith teaches a beautiful lesson: if a small, positive gesture like a smile is so valuable, then a small, negative gesture like an eye-roll can be equally significant in weakening a relationship. By helping your child see that small habits can either heal or harm, you nurture in them a sense of mindfulness and responsibility.