What if siblings keep normalising name-calling by copying each other? 

Parenting Perspective 

It can be exhausting for a parent when siblings fall into a habit of calling each other names. What may begin as teasing can quickly escalate, hurting feelings and normalising disrespect within the home. The problem deepens when this behaviour is copied, creating an environment where hurtful language seems acceptable. If left unchecked, this can erode trust between siblings and even influence how they speak to others outside the family. 

Set a Clear Standard for Respect 

Children need to know, without any ambiguity, that name-calling is not permitted in your home. State your family rule on this matter clearly and enforce it consistently. 

Parent: ‘In our family, we do not use hurtful names. We speak to each other with kindness, even when we are upset.’ 

Keeping this message simple but firm helps to establish it as a core part of your family culture. 

Model Respectful Language 

Your own tone and choice of words serve as the most powerful example. If you model respect during moments of frustration, your children will learn that self-control is the higher standard. When name-calling occurs, intervene calmly, without shouting. 

Parent: ‘I heard that name. Let us find a better way to tell your sister how you are feeling.’ 

This response shows that you expect better and are there to guide them towards it. 

Replace Name-Calling with Positive Expression 

Often, children resort to insults because they lack the vocabulary to express complex emotions. Your role is to teach them these crucial replacement phrases. 

Parent: ‘Instead of saying, “You are so annoying,” you could try saying, “I feel frustrated and need some space right now.”’ 

You can role-play different scenarios, allowing them to practise articulating their feelings in a respectful and constructive way. 

Praise and Reinforce Positive Speech 

Be quick to notice and praise them when they use kind or respectful words, especially during a conflict. A simple remark like, ‘I love how you asked so politely for your turn,’ reinforces the value of good communication. Children will quickly learn that kind words earn your warm attention, while name-calling only results in calm correction. Over time, they will understand that respect is the expected language of love in your family. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam places great emphasis on guarding the tongue, recognising that words have the power to either build or break relationships. Teaching children to avoid name-calling is not just about instilling good manners; it is about nurturing their hearts towards compassion and preserving the dignity of others. 

Quranic Guidance 

Allah Himself directly forbids the act of using offensive names, linking it to sin and dishonour. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Hujuraat (49), Verse 11: 

‘…And do not insult each other; and do not call each other by (offensive) nicknames…’ 

Sharing this clear prohibition with children gives them a profound spiritual reason to choose their words wisely and understand that respecting others is a command from their Creator. 

Prophetic Wisdom 

Belittling another person through insults is described as a significant evil in itself. 

It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 2564, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘It is enough evil for a man to belittle his brother Muslim.’ 

This hadith teaches that a hurtful name is not a small matter; it is a harmful act that damages the bond between people and diminishes one’s own goodness. When you help your children replace name-calling with kindness, you are protecting their hearts from arrogance and cruelty. Over time, they will learn that respectful communication strengthens relationships, and this understanding will become a part of their faith, character, and identity.