How can I include Islamic values in calm behaviour conversations? 

Parenting Perspective 

When addressing their child’s behaviour, parents sometimes hesitate to bring in Islamic values for fear that it will sound like a lecture. However, weaving faith gently into calm conversations helps children to see that Islam is not separate from their daily lives, but is a living guide for how we should act and treat others. The key is to keep these connections relatable and practical, so your child sees the value, not just the rule. 

Link Values to Everyday Actions 

Instead of giving long, abstract talks, you can connect core Islamic values to specific, everyday behaviours. For example: ‘When you chose to share your toy just now, that was an act of sadaqah (charity),’ or ‘Speaking to your grandmother with a kind voice is a part of having good character in Islam.’ These small, positive links help to make faith feel real and encouraging, rather than abstract. 

Use Stories and Examples 

Share short, relevant stories of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ or his companions that relate to the situation at hand. For instance, if your child has lost their temper, you could later say, ‘The Prophet ﷺ taught us that a strong person is the one who can control their anger.’ Stories can connect values to behaviour far more powerfully than direct commands. 

End With Encouragement 

Try to close your disciplinary conversations by reminding your child that every good action, no matter how small, is seen and rewarded by Allah. This helps to make the interaction feel uplifting and motivating, not just corrective, and it frames their good behaviour in a positive spiritual context. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches that tarbiyah (a holistic approach to upbringing) is about instilling faith through wisdom and mercy. Parents are encouraged to connect their everyday guidance with core Islamic values that draw their children closer to Allah. 

Guidance as an Act of Truth and Patience 

The Quran reminds us that guiding one another towards truth and patience, even in small family conversations, is a fundamental duty of a believer. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Asr (103), Verses 2–3: 

‘ Indeed, mankind shall surely (remain in a state of) deprivation (moral deficit), except for those people who are believers and undertake virtuous acts; and encouraging (cultivating within themselves and with one another the realisation and dissemination of) the truth and encouraging (cultivating within themselves and with one another the realisation and accomplishment of) resilience. ‘ 

The Centrality of Good Character 

The prophetic tradition teaches that good character is one of the most beloved qualities to the Prophet ﷺ, making the act of linking discipline to character-building central to an Islamic upbringing. 

It is recorded in Al Adab Al Mufrad, Hadith 272, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The most beloved of you to me is the best of you in character.’ 

By including Islamic values in your calm conversations about behaviour, you are reflecting these beautiful principles of patience and truth. Your child learns that discipline is not only about following rules, but about becoming a person of faith, kindness, and strong character.