Parenting Perspective 

Some children may avoid apologising because they perceive it as a sign of defeat or weakness. They might feel that saying ‘sorry’ lowers their status or damages their pride. As a parent, you can help reframe this perspective by teaching them that a sincere apology is a true mark of strength, responsibility, and maturity. 

Redefine an Apology as an Act of Strength 

Explain the concept of strength in a new way. You can tell your child, “It takes a lot of courage to say you are sorry. People who are weak often try to hide from their mistakes, but strong people are brave enough to admit them and fix them.” This gives them a new and empowering lens through which to view the act of apologising. 

Use Examples of Admirable Role Models 

Children are greatly influenced by their role models. Point out positive examples from stories, Islamic history, or even within your own family where a person admitted to a mistake and was respected even more for it. This helps to demonstrate that a genuine apology actually increases a person’s dignity rather than diminishing it. 

Praise the Humility and Bravery Involved 

When your child offers an apology, make sure to affirm the positive character trait they have just displayed. You could say, “That was very brave of you. It shows that you cared more about making things right than about your own pride.” Linking the apology with virtues like courage and care reinforces its positive meaning and value. 

Model Confident and Sincere Apologies 

Show your child that adults also say sorry with confidence and without shame. If you make a mistake in front of them, apologise openly and sincerely: “I am sorry that I was impatient just now. I will try to do better.” Children who witness this learn from your example that strong, confident people apologise naturally as part of taking responsibility. 

By consistently framing an apology as an act of courage, highlighting positive examples, and praising humility, you can help your child understand that apologising is not a weakness but a powerful demonstration of character. 

Spiritual Insight 

In Islam, the acts of apologising and seeking reconciliation are considered marks of immense spiritual strength and piety, not weakness. The ability to admit a fault, forgive, and mend ties is a quality that is deeply loved by Allah Almighty, and it elevates a person’s true dignity and honour. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Shuraa (42), Verses 43: 

‘And for the person who is patient and forgiving, indeed, (these acts are derived from) higher moral determination.’ 

This verse reminds us that exercising patience and forgiveness, which are integral parts of the apology process, are not signs of weakness but are instead indicators of profound inner strength and resolve. The teachings of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ also redefine our worldly understanding of strength. 

It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 2609, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The strong is not the one who overcomes the people by his strength, but the strong is the one who controls himself while in anger.’ 

This teaches us that true strength is found in self-control, patience, and humility, not in pride, dominance, or a stubborn refusal to admit fault. By connecting the act of apology to the Islamic values of courage, self-mastery, and forgiveness, children learn that saying sorry uplifts them in the sight of both Allah Almighty and the people around them. It becomes a source of honour, not shame, and helps to shape them into confident and compassionate individuals who see undeniable strength in humility.