Parenting Perspective 

It can certainly feel awkward when a child forgets to greet relatives or elders. However, this usually stems from shyness, distraction, or simply a lack of habit rather than any intentional disrespect. The objective is not to cause embarrassment but to guide them gently until offering greetings becomes second nature. 

Offer a Gentle Prompt 

If your child forgets to offer a greeting, you can quietly encourage them with a simple prompt, such as, ‘Remember to say Assalamu Alaikum to your auntie.’ A quiet reminder is far more effective than a public scolding, which can make a child feel resistant or even more self-conscious. Over time, as the behaviour becomes ingrained, these gentle nudges will no longer be necessary. 

Practise in a Familiar Setting 

Role-playing at home is an excellent way to build confidence. You can practise simple greetings and the associated body language, such as standing up, smiling, and speaking clearly. Rehearsing in a low-pressure environment helps to reduce a child’s hesitation when they are faced with a real social situation. 

Reinforce with Positive Feedback 

When your child remembers to greet someone, acknowledge their effort afterwards. A simple comment like, ‘I was pleased to see you greet Uncle so warmly; that showed wonderful manners,’ makes the act feel rewarding. This positive reinforcement helps them understand the value of the greeting, transforming it from a chore into a meaningful expression of respect. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam places great importance on initiating greetings of peace, treating it as a significant duty, especially when welcoming elders and guests into our homes. 

The Divine Command for Reciprocation 

The Quran teaches us that greetings are a form of worship that should be offered and returned with sincerity and kindness, as they hold a special status with Allah. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Nisa (4), Verses 86: 

‘ And when you are greeted with a welcome, then greet them with (a welcome that is) even better than that, or (at least) return it (in the same manner); indeed, Allah (Almighty) is the Final Reckoner over everything.‘ 

The Proactive Nature of Greeting 

The teachings of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ clarify that offering a greeting is an active responsibility, not a passive one to be overlooked. 

It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 6232, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The one who is riding should greet the one who is walking, the one who is walking should greet the one who is sitting, and the smaller group should greet the larger group.’ 

This guidance illustrates that initiating a greeting is an active duty that brings order and humility to social interactions. By helping your child with gentleness and consistency, you teach them that saying salaam is not just polite but an Islamic responsibility that carries blessings.