Parenting Perspective 

Link Consequences to Choices 

When a group of children ignores the rules, it is important to respond without creating resentment. The most effective approach is to calmly and predictably link the consequence directly to the behaviour. Instead of scolding, a parent can state simply, ‘Since we were not able to follow the rules for this game, we are going to take a break from it now.’ This shows that the outcome is a natural result of their collective choice, not a result of your anger. 

Keep It Collective and Fair 

For a group, it is best to choose a natural consequence that affects everyone equally, such as ending a game early. However, this should always be balanced with an opportunity for repair: ‘Let’s try this again tomorrow, and I am sure we can all work together.’ This turns the consequence into a learning opportunity. When they do succeed, make sure to praise their group effort: ‘Well done, everyone played so fairly that time!’ 

Focus on Learning, Not Punishment 

This approach helps children learn that rules matter and that actions have results, while still feeling safe and respected. The goal is to build accountability without discouraging the child who follows rules or alienating the one who struggles. 

Spiritual Insight 

Every Action is Weighed 

Islam teaches that every individual is accountable for their own actions. The Quran reminds us that even the smallest of deeds, good or bad, are seen by Allah and carry weight. This is a foundational principle of responsibility. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Zalzalah (99), Verses 7-8: 

‘Thus, everyone’s actions equivalent to the measurement of an atom that is good shall be observed by them (on the Day of judgement). And everyone’s actions equivalent to the measurement of an atom that is wicked shall be observed by them (on the Day of judgement).‘ 

The Best Who Err are Those Who Repent 

The prophetic tradition teaches that making mistakes is a part of our human nature. However, the best of people are not those who are perfect, but those who learn from their errors and turn back to what is right. 

It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, 2499, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Every son of Adam commits sins, and the best of those who commit sins are those who repent.’ 

Accountability with Hope and Mercy 

By teaching consequences gently and always pairing them with a second chance, you show your children that accountability is always coupled with hope and mercy. This helps them to respect rules while developing a sense of responsibility in their family life and in their faith.