Parenting Perspective 

Conflicts regarding food portions or treats often stem from a deeper need for fairness, emotional comfort, or control. Children may link food with affection or value, and perceived inequality can trigger frustration or rivalry. If left unchecked, such situations can lead to patterns of entitlement or unhealthy comparison. 

Foster balance through clarity and consistency 

• Set clear expectations before meals or treat times 

• Use uniform plates or bowls to avoid perceived bias 

• Rotate who is served first to promote fairness 

• Say calmly: Everyone will receive the same portion 

• Pause before reacting to disputes remain steady and centred 

• Guide them: This seems important to both of you. Let us find a fair way together 

• Teach that fairness is about values, not just equal results 

Avoid using food as a tool for discipline or reward. Gradually build family routines that emphasise generosity, moderation, and mutual respect. These moments foster both harmony and emotional intelligence. 

Spiritual Insight 

Allah Almighty states in Surah Al Hashar (59), Verse 9: 

‘…And giving preference over themselves, even though they were impecunious themselves…. ‘

This verse teaches that true generosity arises when we are willing to share, even in limitation. Sweets and snacks become opportunities to teach this selflessness. 

The Holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ consistently promoted equity and sharing at the table. It is narrated in Sunan Ibn Majah, Hadith 3255: 

‘The food of one is sufficient for two, and the food of two is sufficient for three or four, and the food of four is sufficient for five or six. ‘

Use this as a teaching moment: Ask your child, What would the Holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ do if he had only one date and two people to feed? Encourage them to reflect and emulate. 

Introduce a family prayer such as: 

O Allah, grant us contentment and help us share with love. 

With steady, values-led parenting, even small disagreements over treats become lessons in grace and giving.