Parenting Perspective 

Prepare Them Before Playing 

Losing can be very difficult for a child to handle. The key is to teach them emotional regulation, reminding them that games are about having fun, not just about winning. It helps to set expectations before the game begins. Explain that sometimes we win and sometimes we lose, and both outcomes are a normal part of playing. This simple preparation can reduce the shock and disappointment of losing. 

Stay Calm and Model Composure 

When a tantrum does happen, it is crucial to avoid responding with anger. Instead, remain calm and acknowledge their feelings: ‘I can see you are upset about losing, but shouting will not change the result.’ Modelling composure is the best way to teach a child how to handle disappointment. Later, when they are calm, you can talk with them about other ways to handle those strong feelings next time. 

Reward Good Sportsmanship, Not Just Winning 

Try to make winning less of the central focus and instead celebrate moments of good character. If your child manages to congratulate the winner despite their own disappointment, make sure to highlight it: ‘I was so proud of you for showing such kindness, even though you did not win.’ Over time, they will learn to value good sportsmanship over victory. 

Spiritual Insight 

Success is Through Patience and Perseverance 

Islam teaches that life is filled with wins and losses, and true success in the sight of Allah is found in perseverance and patience, not just in achieving worldly victories. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Aalai Imran (3), Verse 200: 

‘O you who are believers, be patient, and be resilient, and be constant, and attain piety from Allah (Almighty) so that you may be successful.‘ 

True Strength is in Self-Control 

The prophetic tradition redefines strength not as the ability to overpower others, but as the ability to control one’s own anger. This is a powerful lesson for a child who is upset about losing a game. 

It is recorded in Al Adab Al Mufrad, 1317, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The strong man is not the one who can overpower others, but the one who controls himself when angry.’ 

Losing as an Opportunity to Grow 

When you connect the experience of losing a game to the Islamic virtues of patience and self-control, your child learns that their self-worth is not dependent on winning. They begin to see every outcome, win or lose, as an opportunity to grow in resilience, humility, and closeness to Allah.