How do I stay connected with my child even when I have to set limits? 

Parenting Perspective 

Establishing boundaries is an essential aspect of parenting, yet it does not need to negatively impact the emotional bond with your child. Children tend to feel more secure when their parents establish clear and consistent expectations while also showing warmth. 

Setting Limits with Empathy 

You can decline something while still maintaining a positive connection with the other person. This can be achieved by: 

• Maintaining a calm demeanour 

• Showing understanding 

• Allowing the child to express their feelings while keeping the boundary intact 

Example: I understand that you are feeling upset about not being able to play right now, but I can still help you in cleaning up. 

This approach to setting limits demonstrates how to manage emotions and shows respect. Being consistent while also being emotionally available teaches children that boundaries are an essential part of a healthy relationship, rather than a denial of their worth as individuals. As time goes on, this helps children learn to honour boundaries without feeling scared or detached from their carer. 

Spiritual Insight 

Parenting in Islam balances compassion with firmness. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Furqaan (25), Verse 63: 

And the true servants of the One Who is Most Beneficent are those who, wander around the Earth with humility; and when they are addressed by the ignorant people, they say: “peace be unto you”. 

This verse reminds believers that humility and calm should characterise even difficult responses. 

It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, Hadith 1952, that holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ stated: 

There is no gift that a father gives his son more virtuous than good manners. 

Good manners involve helping a child develop self-control in a gentle and clear manner. A home that aligns with faith is built on intentional parenting, combining strong guidance with a sense of emotional safety, rather than depending on fear or leniency. This connection fosters mutual respect and establishes a foundation for moral and emotional growth.