Parenting Perspective 

Casual conversations among children about pocket money can leave a lasting impression. When a child hears their peers boasting about receiving large allowances, they may begin to feel deprived or undervalued in comparison. Even when their own needs are fully met, this constant social comparison can lead to dissatisfaction with what they have. 

Creating Feelings of Inequality 

Children might wrongly interpret receiving a smaller amount of pocket money as a sign that their parents care less for them. This can create frustration and emotional insecurity, even though the amount given is simply a reflection of the family’s circumstances and values. 

The Pressure to Compete 

These conversations can lead to unhealthy social pressures. 

• Children may begin to demand more money than their parents can reasonably provide. 

• They might compare their spending power with friends, which can lead to exclusion if they cannot keep up. 

• Some may even feel the need to hide the truth about their allowance out of embarrassment. 

Shaping Unhealthy Spending Habits 

When children focus on the amount of money they receive rather than on how to use it wisely, they risk developing poor financial habits. This can lead to them chasing quantity over the more important values of responsibility and gratitude. 

Supporting Children Through Peer Comparisons 

Parents can help their children build a healthier relationship with money. 

• Explain that every family is different and that the amount of money given is not a measure of love. 

• Focus on teaching budgeting skills, showing them how to manage and value whatever amount they receive. 

• Emphasise effort and responsibility, perhaps by linking pocket money to chores or by teaching them about charity. 

• Celebrate wise spending or saving habits more than the size of an allowance. 

This guidance helps children to build satisfaction, independence, and resilience against the pressure of peer comparison. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches that all provision comes from Allah, and that true satisfaction (qanā‘ah) is a far greater blessing than mere material abundance. Conversations among peers that fuel envy or discontent must be balanced with gentle spiritual reminders about the importance of gratitude. 

A Reminder on Divine Provision 

The Quran reminds us that Allah distributes his provision with perfect wisdom, giving each person what is best for them. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Shuraa (42), Verse 27: 

‘ And if Allah (Almighty) were to extend (infinitely) the provisions for nourishment for His servants, there would be chaos on Earth; and that is why He transmits what He desires in proportionate measures; indeed, He is All Cognisant and All Seeing over His servants.‘ 

This verse teaches us that Allah’s provision is perfectly measured according to His wisdom. 

The Prophetic Teaching on True Contentment 

The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ taught that a person who has their basic needs met is truly wealthy, regardless of how much money they possess. 

It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, Hadith 2346, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Whoever among you wakes up secure in his property, healthy in his body, and he has food for his day, it is as if the world has been gathered for him.’ 

This hadith shows that true wealth lies in gratitude for the fundamental blessings of health, safety, and sustenance. 

By linking pocket money to the concepts of gratitude and responsibility, parents can help their children focus on what they have, rather than on what others receive. This nurtures satisfaction and resilience, encouraging a heart that values blessings as gifts from Allah, not as measures of a person’s worth.