How can parents stay calm if their child dismisses their safety concerns as ‘outdated thinking’? 

Parenting Perspective 

It is a common experience for parents to have their safety concerns brushed off by a teenager with remarks like, ‘That is outdated thinking,’ or ‘You are worrying too much.’ While this can be frustrating, it is important to remember that such dismissiveness often stems from a combination of youthful overconfidence and immaturity. By staying calm, parents can prevent the conversation from escalating into a conflict, keeping the lines of communication open so that their important safety concerns can be heard and respected. 

Do Not React With Anger or Sarcasm 

Rather than reacting defensively, it is more effective to first acknowledge their perspective: ‘I know that some things are different now compared to when I was growing up, but the principle of being safe never goes out of date.’ This validates their point of view while still holding your ground on the core issue. 

Use Real-Life Examples 

Instead of only giving abstract warnings, you can share real and relatable stories where ignoring safety rules led to genuine harm. These could be from the news, the local community, or even a family experience. This demonstrates that your concerns are rooted in reality, not in irrational fear. 

Frame Your Guidance as Care, Not Control 

Remind them of your motivation by saying: ‘My role as your parent is not to limit your freedom, but to protect you. These rules are not outdated; they are reminders that your safety will always matter more to me than any popular trend.’ This helps to reframe your rules in the context of love and responsibility. 

Keep the Door for Dialogue Open 

Invite them to explain their point of view without interruption: ‘Help me to understand why you feel this way of thinking is outdated.’ Listening calmly and respectfully shows that you value their opinion, which increases the chance that they will listen in return. 

By balancing calm authority with empathetic listening, parents can turn dismissive remarks into teachable conversations about the timeless values of protection and wisdom. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam reminds us that core principles like safety, dignity, and modesty are timeless and do not expire. What may seem ‘old-fashioned’ to one generation is often rooted in the eternal wisdom that is designed to protect all generations from regret. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Noor (24), Verses 30: 

‘ Say (O Prophet Muhammad ﷺ) to the believing men to lower their gaze (upon forbidden things); and protect their private parts (with chastity)…’ 

This verse is a clear example of a timeless safeguard. It reminds us that Allah’s commands related to our protection and modesty are not outdated restrictions, but are in fact a mercy for our own well-being. 

It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, 7144, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘It is obligatory for a Muslim to listen and obey if he is not ordered to commit a sin. If he is ordered to commit a sin, there is no listening and no obedience.’ 

This teaching establishes a crucial principle: our ultimate obedience is always to the Creator. Therefore, guidance that is rooted in protecting a person from sin remains firm and relevant, even if society or peers mock it as being old-fashioned. 

By showing calmness and connecting your safety concerns back to these eternal Islamic values, you can help your children to see that your caution is not outdated, but is a timeless expression of care. Over time, they can learn that real maturity lies in respecting the wisdom that protects them, even when it feels unpopular.