How can parents stay emotionally secure when children laugh at their slower tech skills? 

Parenting Perspective 

It can certainly be hurtful when children laugh at a parent’s slower pace with technology. While this laughter is often playful and stems from immaturity rather than malice, it can still leave a parent feeling disrespected or left behind. The key is to remain emotionally secure, demonstrating that your self-worth is not tied to keeping up with every new app, while still taking the opportunity to teach your child about the importance of respect. 

Do Not Take the Laughter as a Personal Failure 

It is important to remind yourself that your authority as a parent is derived from your wisdom, life experience, and values, not from your ability to navigate technology at high speed. A child’s light-hearted teasing does not diminish your fundamental role as their guide and guardian. 

Model Calm Confidence 

Respond to their laughter with composure, not defensiveness. You could say gently: ‘I may be slower with this particular app, but there are many things in life that I have mastered and that you will one day learn too.’ This subtly reminds your child of the balance between youthful technical skill and adult wisdom. 

Turn It Into Light Humour, Then Teach Respect 

Sometimes, laughing along with your child can diffuse the initial sting and show that you are not insecure. However, it is important to follow up at a later, calmer moment to set a clear boundary: ‘It is okay for you to notice that I am slower with technology, but it is not respectful to mock me for it.’ This approach models resilience while also reinforcing the importance of good manners (adab). 

Focus on Your Emotional Strength 

Show your child that your confidence is not shaken by being less skilled in one particular area. This provides a valuable life lesson: that true strength is found in composure and dignity, not in being perfect at everything. 

By remaining secure and calm in these moments, parents can teach their children that respect must always flow in both directions, and that laughter should never be allowed to cross the line into belittling. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches that a person’s true dignity (karamah) is not diminished by what they do or do not know, but by the manner in which they carry themselves with patience and respect. Children, in turn, are consistently reminded to treat their parents with the utmost honour, regardless of the circumstances. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Israa (17), Verses 23: 

‘ And your Sustainer has decreed that you do not worship anyone except Him Alone; And (treat) parents favourably; whether one of them or both of them reach old age in your lifetime; then do not say to either of them ‘Uff’ (an expression of disrespectful frustration) and do not admonish them; and talk to them with kind words.‘ 

This verse makes it clear that even the smallest words or gestures of disrespect towards parents are forbidden, and that kindness must always guide these interactions. 

It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 2609, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The strong man is not the one who overpowers in wrestling, but the strong man is the one who controls himself when angry.’ 

This teaching shows that true emotional strength is demonstrated through self-control and composure, especially when one feels hurt or is being mocked. 

By embodying patience and using these moments to calmly correct their children, parents can preserve their own dignity while modelling true resilience. Over time, children will learn that respect is an integral part of faith, and that laughter should never be allowed to compromise the honour that is owed to their parents.