How to Model Turning to Allah, Not Your Phone 

Parenting Perspective 

Reshape Habits Through Gradual, Consistent Changes 

Children learn most strongly from what they see, often more than from what they are told. When they watch you turn to your phone in moments of stress, they naturally associate relief with distraction rather than with remembrance. The good news is that this can be reshaped gradually through small, consistent changes in your daily responses. 

Pause and Replace the Habit 

The first step is not to blame yourself but to acknowledge the habit with honesty. Then, set intentional cues for yourself. For example, when you feel the urge to reach for your phone in stress, pause and replace it with a brief dhikr, such as quietly saying ‘SubhanAllah’ or ‘HasbunAllahu wa ni‘mal wakeel.’ If your children are nearby, say it aloud so they see you choosing this response. Over time, this shift becomes both a habit for you and a live lesson for them. 

Create Rituals of Peace 

You can also create rituals of peace in the home. After a stressful day, sit for a few minutes with your children and invite them to breathe deeply with you, followed by a short dua or recitation of Surah Al Ikhlas together. This transforms a private struggle into a shared spiritual practice, modelling that comfort is found in Allah’s remembrance, not in avoidance. 

Use Slips as a Teaching Opportunity 

If you slip and use your phone, use that moment as a teaching opportunity instead of hiding it. You could say, ‘I felt stressed and picked up my phone, but really what helps most is remembering Allah.’ This transparency shows your children that faith is a process of striving, not perfection, and it reassures them that turning back to Allah is always possible. 

Spiritual Insight 

In the Remembrance of Allah Do Hearts Find Rest 

True peace comes only from Allah, and Islam teaches us to actively seek it in times of hardship. Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Ra’ad (13), Verse 28: 

‘…Indeed, it is only with the remembrance of Allah (Almighty) that (one can (and does) find peace of mind and heart.’ 

This Verse reminds us that while the world offers distractions, only the remembrance of Allah gives lasting tranquility. When you model this before your children, you are teaching them that relief is not found in escape but in connection to their Creator. 

Strength Is Choosing Patience, Not Distraction 

It is recorded in Al Adab Al-Mufrad, Book 57, Hadith 1, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The strong person is not the one who can overpower others in wrestling; the strong person is the one who controls himself when angry.’  

Applying this hadith to parenting, real strength is not in avoiding stress through distraction but in choosing patience and turning to Allah when overwhelmed. By gradually showing this practice, even in small ways, you demonstrate to your children that faith is a living source of comfort. 

In time, they will associate peace with prayer, dhikr, and dua because they saw you choose these over fleeting distractions. Your effort to model reliance on Allah will not only bring calm into your own heart but also plant deep trust in theirs that peace is always within reach through Him.