How to Model Trust in Allah and Let Your Child Grow 

Parenting Perspective 

Model a Healthy Balance of Safety and Freedom 

It is very insightful that you are noticing the link between your own emotions and your child’s behaviour. Children often absorb their parent’s state, so if a parent struggles to let go, the child may mirror this by holding on more tightly. This does not mean you are failing, but rather that your awareness now gives you the chance to model a healthier balance of safety and freedom. 

Separate Your Fears From Your Child’s Needs 

Begin by asking yourself what lies behind your hesitation to let go. Is it fear of harm, fear of mistakes, or worry about them not needing you? Naming this quietly to yourself helps you separate your fears from your child’s needs. Then, in practice, give your child small opportunities to do things independently. Allow them to walk a few steps ahead, make a small choice, or complete a task without your intervention. When they succeed, celebrate it. When they struggle, offer calm reassurance rather than taking over immediately. This shows them that your love is steady but not smothering. 

Let Them See How You Cope 

It is also powerful to let your child see how you cope with letting go. For example, saying gently, ‘I trust you to try this, and I am here if you need me,’ communicates safety without control. Over time, these moments build their confidence and teach them that freedom does not mean abandonment, but responsibility within love. By doing this consistently, you are teaching both your child and yourself to rely on Allah while growing in independence. 

Spiritual Insight 

You Are a Caretaker, Not the Ultimate Protector 

As parents, it is natural to feel torn between wanting to protect our children and knowing that one day we must allow them to step into the world with their own strength. Islam recognises this tension and gives us a framework of balance: we are caretakers who make effort, but we are not the ultimate protectors. That role belongs only to Allah. Remembering this helps reduce the weight you carry alone and teaches your child that their safety comes from Allah before anyone else. 

Put Your Trust in Allah 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Aalai Imran (3), Verse 159: 

‘…Then when you have decided (on any matter), then put your reliance upon Allah (Almighty); indeed, Allah (Almighty) loves those who are totally reliant on Him.’  

This Verse reminds parents that after doing what is in their control, they must place their trust in Allah. Your role is to guide, prepare, and reassure, but the final outcome rests with Him. 

True Tawakkul Is Effort Tied With Trust 

It is recorded in Sunan Abu Dawud, Book 1, Hadith 313, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Tie your camel first, then put your trust in Allah.’  

The lesson is that parents should take practical steps to protect and nurture their children but avoid holding on with fear. True Tawakkul is effort tied with trust. 

When you practise this balance, you show your child that love is not about control but about care rooted in faith. This allows them to feel both secure in your presence and free to grow with confidence, knowing that Allah is always with them.