How can parents guide children who feel left out when they do not own the latest trendy app? 

Parenting Perspective 

It is perfectly natural for a child to feel left out when their friends and classmates are all talking about the latest trendy app that they are not allowed to use. Parents are often caught in a difficult position: giving in might expose their child to harmful content, but saying no can lead to painful feelings of social exclusion. The goal is not simply to ban or allow the app, but to use the moment to help your child understand your family’s values, build resilience, and find a sense of belonging in healthier ways. 

Validate Their Feelings 

Start by acknowledging their disappointment with sincerity: ‘I can understand that it must feel really difficult when all your friends are using an app that you are not. It must feel like you are missing out on the fun.’ This simple act of empathy shows that you are taking their feelings seriously, which prevents resentment and opens space for dialogue. 

Explain the Reason Behind Boundaries 

Make it clear that your decision comes from a place of love and protection, not from a desire to deprive them. You could say: ‘I know some of these apps look like a lot of fun, but they also have certain risks that we do not think are safe for you at this stage. Our most important job is protecting you until we feel you are ready.’ Explaining the ‘why’ helps to build respect for the boundary. 

Offer Alternatives for Belonging 

Actively help your child to find other ways to connect with friends that are not dependent on a particular app. This could involve hosting a friend at your home, arranging a group activity like a park visit or a sports game, or finding other, safer platforms where they can share and interact. This shows them that belonging is not tied to a single app. 

Build Confidence in Being Different 

Use this as an opportunity to celebrate the courage it takes to stand apart from the crowd. Remind them: ‘Being different does not mean you are less than others. Sometimes, making the choice that is right for you, even when it is not popular, means you are stronger.’ This helps your child to see that resisting a trend can be an act of dignity, not weakness. 

By combining empathy with clear reasoning and positive alternatives, parents can help their children to cope with the pressure of trends without having to compromise on their safety or values. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam reminds us that following the majority is not a guaranteed path to what is right. What is popular is often not what is most beneficial, and choosing to please Allah Almighty over pleasing one’s peers is a true mark of strength and faith. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Maaidah (5), Verses 100: 

‘ Say (O Prophet Muhammad ﷺ): “The evil and the pure cannot be equated (in any way whatsoever), even though you may be bewildered by many of the evil actions; so, O you people of intellect (and wisdom) seek piety from Allah (Almighty), so that you may be successful”.‘ 

This verse teaches a crucial lesson in discernment. It reminds us that popularity does not determine value; what is good and pure will always be better, even if fewer people are choosing it. 

It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 41, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The Muslim is the one from whose tongue and hand the people are safe.’ 

This teaching provides a moral compass. It reminds us that our identity as Muslims should be defined by the goodness and safety we bring to others, not by our participation in every passing digital trend. 

By sharing this wisdom, parents can help their children to see that missing out on a trendy app is not a true loss. Instead, it is a conscious act of protecting their own dignity and faith. Over time, they will learn that real belonging comes from being grounded in timeless values, not from chasing every new digital wave.