How can we help children see modest dressing and behaviour online as a source of dignity, not restriction? 

Parenting Perspective 

For children growing up online, modesty can sometimes feel like an outdated restriction. The key is to frame it as a source of strength, self-respect, and empowerment in a world that often demands overexposure. 

Reframe Modesty as Empowerment 

Explain that modesty is not about hiding, but about choosing wisely what we share. You can use an analogy: just as we keep precious things safe, modesty protects our dignity and self-respect from unwanted attention. It is a form of empowerment. 

Link It to Self-Worth 

Gently help your child to understand that their worth is not measured by online attention, such as likes or comments. Reinforce that true respect comes from their character, kindness, and values, not from how they look in a photo. 

Show Positive Examples 

Point out role models, whether in your community or in the public eye, who are successful, confident, and respected while also maintaining their modesty. This shows them that dignity and achievement go hand in hand. 

Model the Mindset Yourself 

Your own online presence is a powerful teaching tool. When you share your ideas or achievements without compromising your own modesty, you demonstrate that it is a source of strength and confidence, not a limitation. 

When children see modesty as a choice rooted in self-respect, they are more likely to embrace it willingly. 

Spiritual Insight 

In Islam, modesty (haya) is a comprehensive virtue that encompasses behaviour, speech, and dress. It is not seen as a restriction, but as a defining feature of a believer’s noble character. 

Honour Comes From Righteousness 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Hujurat (49), Verse 13: 

‘Indeed, the most noble of you in the sight of Allah is the most righteous of you…’ 

This reminds us that true dignity and honour are tied to our righteousness and consciousness of Allah (taqwa), not to gaining attention through our outward appearance. 

Modesty as a Mark of Faith 

It is recorded in Sunan Ibn Majah, Hadith 4181, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Indeed, every religion has a distinct characteristic, and the distinct characteristic of Islam is modesty (Haya’).’ 

This teaches us that modesty is a hallmark of our faith that beautifies our character. By teaching our children that haya is a vital part of their Islamic identity, we empower them to present themselves online with a quiet confidence that comes from self-respect and God-consciousness.